Peridot takes on Beach city!
by Absolute7
Summary: Can our favorite lime dorito get a job, get a house, fall in love, AND conquer the world? Follow Peridot as she begins a new adventure to defeat the crystal gems (or maybe not do that). First she'll need a job so she can secure a base of operations. That carwash seems like a good start. Picks up after 'Joy Ride' Don't forget to review so that Peridot can continue her adventure!
1. Peridot Gets a Job

Those 'crystal gems' had done it again. First it was the ship, a device of her own creation, rich with complexity and the product of one hundred years of work. Then, _then_ they had taken it upon themselves to destroy the escape pod. Her last piece of Homeworld technology. Without it she was seriously not in a good way. She could have just left before, never looking back... Not without an army that is. Now she would have to resort to guerrilla tactics. Peridot would have her revenge... Once she found Jasper.

Her plan was simple. She would tap into Earth's communication network, allowing her to hijack frequencies compatible with her gemtech. Her current obstacle was the tall grass that occupied the field all around her. It made too much noise, so there would be no leaving this place as long as the meddling 'crystal gems' and those youths remained in the vicinity. Wait, were they taking pictures? Pictures of themselves in front of the pod?! Peridot could barely contain herself. The rage rising through her was such that she had to grip the ground to prevent herself from standing and yelling something obscene. She could feel a tear slip down her cheek. All of her work, years of planning, gone in a single night. This had been her chance. A mission on which she could prove herself; and she had failed. The shame of it flushed out her anger. She curled up and decided to just wait until dawn, to be sure they were gone.

-One depressing night later

Dawn came beautifully. It illuminated the field in golden red with swaths of pink stretching up the sky. Peridot had seen many suns whilst in space. Massive orbs of burning gas, more dangerous than beautiful while observed from outside of an atmosphere: but this was stunning. You could never see the dawn on homeworld for all the massive spires, so this was a first.

Peridot allowed herself a few moments to observe the scene before rising to her feet. The morning air was crisp, cool and pleasant, but she could not remain here any longer. She projected her screen in front of herself and began tapping away.

"I will need a disguise. I cannot simply shape shift, as my green colouration would draw attention. I will require some sort of cosmetic to change that. Until then..."

Out of the corner of her eye she spotted a farmer riding into the field on a tractor. His clothes would offer an adequate disguise for the time being.

-One theft and long walk later-

"Hmmm... Such primitive equipment." Peridot mumbled to herself as she tried to get the library computer to turn on.

She had made her way to the beach city library. She had to understand how human society functioned if she was going to hide in it. Finally, the machine turned on. The homepage sat before her. She was horribly confused.

"Show me the database on human culture." She commanded the machine to no avail.

"I said, show me the database on human culture!" The machine was obviously mocking her.

"If you do not comply there will be consequences. Now, the database!" Could it be that the human computers did not respond to voice commands?

"Um, miss?" Peridot spun around to see a short, blonde human looking at her quizzically.

"S-speak." Peridot pulled the brim of her hat down to better cover her green skin.

"Are you okay?" The human giggled at the furiously blushing gem.

'I must look a fool. How could I overlook their pitiful technology?' She thought before standing up. "I am perfectly fine. No need for alarm. I just... I need help."

How could she be asking a human for assistance? The shame was palpable.

"You looking for the culture section or something?" Asked the human female, for that is what she was.

Books! Of course. Books were simple. "Yes." said peridot simply, her blush growing.

"Well it's right there, in the back beside history." The girl pointed, "Hey, are you new in town? My name's Sadie, what's yours?"

An alias? She hasn't thought of one. What could she say? What were human names like? What sounds could humans make? How long was too long? How short was too short? The only names she had to go on were Steven and Sadie, did they all start with S? The variables were massive!

"Uuuuuuuuhhhh..." Was all that managed to escape her lips.

"Ookay, I'm gonna go now." The Sadie said as she backed away slowly before turning and exiting the library, leaving Peridot standing there.

'What just happened?!' Peridot berated herself as she walked towards the section the Sadie had pointed her towards. The library was small, so it didn't take much searching to find a few books that could help her. Taking the items in a neat pile, she walked over to a nearby table to read.

-Several books later-

'Humans are boring, unintelligent creatures...' Peridot had sped through the books at superhuman speed, memorizing every detail. None of it had changed her views on the stupidity of humans. It had, however, thrown a wrench in her plans. One of the books she grabbed had been on technology. It had shown her that the humans did not readily have all that she needed to rebuild her communication unit to get in touch with Jasper. She would have to build it herself, and that would require a lot of time and currency. Stupid currency based society, always mucking up perfectly good plans.

The green gem had managed to hide her identity thus far, but she would need some cosmetic products soon if she wanted it to stay hidden. She walked into the beach city drug mart. The bright sign above it read 'Drug Smart' in big blue letters on a glowing white background. Inside the store were isles of health products, candy, and makeup. Peridot made her way to the makeup section with the few coins she had "borrowed" off the farmer clutched in her hand.

"Ah, here we are. This 'foundation' if applied liberally, should do the job." She picked the small bottle off the shelf, yet promptly dropped it when she saw the price.

"Sixteen human dollars? I only have..." she paused to look at her coins, "seventy five cents..."

Defeat at every turn! First the ship, then the pod, then the library, and now she could not even procure a disguise! But wait, why did she have to _buy_ it... A quick scan of the store showed her that their security system was easily bypassed. All she had to do was bubble the item to just outside the establishment. Who was foiling who now, human society?!

-One overly long visit to the public restroom later-

Peridot had shape shifted and applied the makeup. Now she appeared as a normal adult human. She had opted for the age where she would receive the most respect without people thinking her old, while also being left alone. This put her somewhere between thirty and thirty five. Now, onto her next objective; finding a job. She needed a reliable source of currency that required minimum effort on her part. She also had zero "qualifications" so that would make it difficult to find a well paying job. This was obviously going to be a long and involved process: hopefully Jasper would still be on the planet when she finished.

-A short walk later-

The midday sun beat down on Peridot as she made her way down the boardwalk looking for any 'help wanted' posters. It seemed all these businesses were family owned and operated, so that complicated matters even further.

She had all but given up hope when she saw a poster fluttering through the wind. She calculated where it would fly to and expertly plucked it out of the air. It was crude and hand drawn, with some of the details smudged out.

"What in the stars is this..." The green gem mused for a moment before noticing the human running towards her.

"Hey," he took a moment to catch his breath, "did you catch my poster?" He was a round, sunburnt man. Sporting a beard and incredibly long hair despite the fact that his very visible baldness had progressed to an extremely advanced stage.. His face (minus the facial hair) was familiar, but Peridot couldn't quite place it.

"Indeed I did," she held it out for him, "do you require it returned?"

He took the paper back sheepishly. "Yeah, Its kind of important." He looked at her for a moment, thinking visibly. "Do you need a job?"

How could he gave guessed? Was she visibly unemployed? That didn't make any sense, wait, the poster. Could it be a terribly crafted 'help wanted' sign?

"Yeah… I guess you could call it that." Said the bearded man in defeat. Wait, had she spoken aloud?! Her hands flew to cover her mouth. What was the correct earth courtesy to recover from such a social misstep? Ah, yes. Apologizing.

"I… I apologize. I did not mean to say that." She was hardly able to force the words out. Humans were below her, she shouldn't have to apologize to them.

"Ah, don't sweat it. And no, you don't look unemployed. I was just hopeful." The man sat down on the side of the boardwalk, letting his head rest in his hands. He was pitiful to behold. "It's just that, I own the 'It's a wash' In town. It's hard to find employees when even _I_ hardly want to be there."

Why was the human telling her this? Well, since the opportunity had arisen, maybe it would be best to attempt normal interactions and see how she did, perhaps she would gain employment in the process. "Do you not enjoy your car washing duties?"

"Not really. I'm a musician at heart. That's why I want an employee, so I can spend more time focusing on what really matters. My son, and my music." He had offspring? Interesting, perhaps she could leverage this seeming desperation.

"Well, I am looking for work. Could you forgive what I said earlier? I'm sure your child would be grateful for having time with it's father." She sat down beside the man and held out her hand for him to shake, yet another custom which disgusted her.

"I dunno about just giving you the job… But you've got an interview!" He took her hand. "Name's Greg. Yours?"

Oh stars. Not the name thing again. Quickly, a name that begins with P. Wait, humans name their children after items on occasion, no? Parka, Pants, Pentagon, Pore… no, none of those. Inspiration! The handful of change she had been holding earlier. The smallest and most unassuming coin was "The Penny. My name is The Penny." He just stared at her. Perhaps not all human names should have 'The' in them. "I mean Penny. Just Penny." She shook his hand. Her plan was moving smoothly.

-One week of wet work later-

Her plan was a terribly wretched thing. She hadn't had a single clue what a 'carwash' was when she had applied and, now that she was an employee (despite lacking any identification), she really wished she'd known water was going to be involved. Peridot was not fond of water in the slightest. It didn't get along with her machines.

She had opted to take extra shifts for faster money. It was now around seven o'clock, and she had been washing cars since her lunch break had ended. She was completely soaked. Most of the process was automated, but the machines were in terrible disrepair; the pipes leaked, and the whole thing looked ready to burst at a moments notice.

"Dad? Daaaaad?" The call came from just outside the building. The voice was… Familiar. Who could it be? Greg was out getting food for the two of them, so she would have to check.

"Hello?" Asked the disguised gem as she rounded the corner to see who was- Peridot stopped in her tracks. It was The Steven. Had he found her somehow? Could he recognize her? She would have to terminate him.

"Oh, hi there. Who're you?" The question snapped her out of her downward spiraling train of thought.

"H-hello small human whom I have never met before." Perfection. Her disguise was still in tact. But wait, why was he staring at her like that. Had she misspoken?

"You're kind of weird. Do you know where my dad is?" Damn, he knew something was up.

"Oh." It clicked, Greg was The Steven's parent. "Your father is out right now. May I... Take a message?"

"No it's okay. I'll wait." He wandered over to the lawn chairs Greg kept outside. He sat down and began humming a tune under his breath. Humans were such strange creatures. Music was banned on Homeworld, too inefficient and more than a little pointless. The gem walked away quietly; she didn't want to be around The Steven longer than she had to be. Her disguise held up, but how long before another Crystal Gem came? She would have to leave. She had assumed (foolishly) that they did not interact with humans. She would need a new base from which to operate. She would resign in the morning.

"Hey Penny, get out here!" That was Greg. He didn't sound upset, but Peridot was reluctant to go out to where The Steven likely remained.

"Coming." She said reluctantly. Hopefully this would be short, who knew when one of the other gems would come by.

Greg was waiting outside, carrying a pizza box with one hand while he did some sort of handshake with his son. "Penny, why don't you come and eat with me and the boy? He helps out here sometimes, so you guys should get acquainted."

"Ah, well... Um... The car wash, don't we need to keep it open?"

"Nah, it'll be fine. We aren't going far."

Well, no way to realistically refuse. At least she'd get to try eating.

\- Rather far from the car wash-

"See, not too far at all." Greg managed to say despite his exhausted breathing. It wasn't that far by Peridots standards, but then again humans _are_ just meat bags.

"Now, we eat!" The Steven held up a slice of pizza triumphantly before stuffing the whole thing into his mouth and falling into a sitting position on the ground.

Greg joined his son on the ground and began to eat some of the cheese-covered bread disc with The Steven. The two of them continued for a few moments before the older human remembered his employee standing awkwardly to the side. "Well, come over and join us Penny. You can't see the view like that."

The view? They were on top of a hill. Perhaps there was something of interest that could be perceived if she turned arou- Oh. Oh yes there was. The entirety of beach city stretched out before them. She had seen it from her ship, but this was so much more real: it was breathtaking. Or would have been. If she'd had breath to take. She stood there, just taking it in. The soft light of the city dancing across the water like an upside down aurora changing with the waves. It was magnificent.

"Okay Steven, I've been trying out some lyrics for a new song. Care to be my guinea pig and give them a listen?" Peridot was trying to take in the details of the scene before her and thus barely registered that Greg was speaking. "I like to make a song for everyone I meet, so I can remember them better. This one is about you, Penny."

Wait, music, about her? Unacceptable. She turned to see that Greg had pulled out his guitar (where had that come from?) and was strumming a few chords in preparation for the song. "Greg, you really shouldn't."

"No arguing Penny, I'm your boss." Greg smiled childishly before he began the song.

"All on her own  
In a new town by the sea  
The wind sealed our fates  
And lead her to me"

Now she works in a car wash  
To earn her own way  
Bubbles in her hair  
As she walks by the bay...

I haven't figured out a chorus yet..."

Greg had finished the song, but Peridot couldn't process it. Was that what music was like? It was so… fantastic. It was the best thing she had ever heard. How could homeworld have banned something so wonderful? How in all her years had she not found this before? How could she leave now that she had heard this?

The Steven started applauding and the disguised gem clapped right along with him, "That was really good dad, is that all you have?"

"Well, I mean, I just met her. There isn't even anything personal in the song." Greg scratched the back of his head, "I'm sure it'll be better in not too long." He put his guitar away and leaned back on the hill. "What'd you think Penny? Pretty good for an old ex-rocker, right?"

"I…" Peridot didn't know what to say. She had never heard music, and now there was a song about her? It was all a little bit overwhelming. More than a little bit really. Quite a bit in actuality. She would have to tell him what she thought. "I think it was lovely Greg, I can't wait to hear the rest." She tried to do her best pleasant smile.

Greg's cheeks turned a bright red, "Well, I'm glad you like it." He dropped his eyes to the ground. "Why don't you have some pizza, I need to get Steven home soon, so we shouldn't stick around much longer. Besides," He took another slice before continuing with his mouth full, "It's really good!"

"Oh, yes. The pizza. A food which I have certainly eaten before." Smooth. Just like always. She picked up the slice, cheese clinging to the other pieces in the box in strands. How could humans eat this? She took a bite.

-A few minutes (and a gas station bathroom) later-

The absolute repulsion she now felt for humans would have driven her to violence had her spirits not been so high after the music. That they would willingly ingest material similar to that on a regular basis, much less multiple times a day, was insane.

Peridot stood up from where she had been kneeling in front of the toilet. She had just managed to down the slice before rushing off to the closest bathroom to regurgitate the cheesy mess down the drain.

She walked outside into the night air. Greg had taken The Steven (It was dawning on her that he may just be called 'Steven') back to his home when she had rushed off. She was glad for the solitude. Gave her time to think.

She took up a spot on the hill they had been eating on moments before. The light show remained as brilliant as before. Homeworld was all spires, no room for views like this. She was coming to realize homeworld didn't have room for much of anything. Maybe after she conquered this planet she would go and get music unbanned. Then take up singing and travel the galaxy, looking for places like this.

She leaned back to watch the stars. She had an entire night of not sleeping to fill, and she could plan like this. So, onto planning. Her wages were nearly sufficient to claim a place of residence for use as a base of operations. After that she would have to collect all the communication equipment. And then she would have to build a machine capable of scanning the planet for Jasper, locking onto her frequency, and making contact. It would take time. But at least now she knew of something to help her pass the time.

If anyone had happened to be walking near the hill that night, they would have heard a soft voice singing Greg's song. Slightly off-tune, but not all that bad.

 **A/N:** So, this is a thing. I got stumped on how to continue my last fic, so I decided to try my hand on another (and vastly different) source material. Make sure to tell me what you think, feedback is always good. I can't get better without it.


	2. House Party: Part 1

**A/N:** Would you look at that, I actually finished this within the timeframe I set for myself. Anyways, enjoy!

\- Homeworld-

 _Light. Extremely bright. Uncomfortable. A hand could block it. Wait, what is a hand? What is light? What is happening? How does it know so much? What is knowing?_

"Hello." A gentle voice was coming from beside the light. The figure, though just a silhouette, seemed to be a giant with a large mass of curled, blonde hair.

"What… What is…"

"What is going on? It's called life. You'll get used to it." The figure laughed and the light dimmed, allowing a better view of them. She was nearly eight feet tall, wearing a silvery white dress with a hole in the stomach so that you could see the yellow diamond embedded in her midsection.

"Yellow Diamond. Your name is Yellow Diamond. How did I know that?"

"You were preprogrammed with vast amounts of knowledge. Just give it time, then you'll understand. Do you know who you are?" She took a seat in front of the new gem and placed a hand on it's cheek, the warmth of her body flooding into its newly formed one. No, not it, _her_. She was starting to understand the knowledge now. She was a peridot. She was the first of the fifth. Peridot 5.

"I am a peridot, a service and logistics gem. Made to replace the now defunct pearl series. I am the first of the fifth iteration of peridots." The knowledge was locking into place.

"Good. Very good." Yellow Diamond smiled; a beautiful smile. Peridot 5 could feel heat rise up in her cheeks. "Do you know why you were created?"

Peridot 5 saw a blue globe with swaths of green and brown in her mind's eye. It was a troublesome thing, it had brought Yellow Diamond and her sisters great hardship. "Yes. Earth."

-Beach city, Earth-

Peridot had been working with Greg for nearly a month now, and things were going well. She was close to having enough money saved up for the first in a long line of human devices she would have to scavenge from, and no one (as far as she could tell) in the entire city suspected she was an alien attempting to destroy life as they knew it. She was content.

"Penny, we have a bit of a problem." Ah yes, her employer. He was a bit of a bumbling idiot, but he had a good heart. It made him the perfect human to hide in plain sight with; and his music made it at least a tad bearable.

"Yes Greg?" she turned to see that Greg had, in the five minutes she'd been looking away, managed to absolutely soak himself, showcasing the bumbling and idiot parts of his personality with seemingly rehearsed finesse.

"The hose is busted again. We're gonna have to close down for a few hours while I fix it…" Greg scratched the back of his head wonderingly, "I just can't figure out what the problem is…" Peridot, of course, knew that the problem was not within the hose, but within the pump it was connected to. One of the main pipes was badly rusted. Obviously, no human could have known this without taking the machine apart. Considering, she thought it best to kept it to herself.

 _Really the entire machine should be redone..._ Humans always did things the wrong way and it was really starting to annoy her. If she just had a flask robonoid then she could fix the entire thing. It would certainly make her life a lot drier and easier.

"If we're going to shut down, can I get you anything?" Peridot had read that humans felt they owed people who did random menial duties that were not required of them. She never quite had a chance to stop being baffled by humans. There was always more dumb to find.

"Well, you know if you wouldn't mind going to The Big Donut I could do with a snack. Here." Greg handed her a crumpled wad of money. "No need to hurry though. This'll take some time." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a massive roll of duct tape.

-The Big Donut, moments later-

"Hey there, welcome to The Big Donut. How can we help you today?" The teen sitting behind the counter was familiar. Oh no, it was The Sadie! Or, was it just Sadie... This could be awkward.

"Ah, yes. Hello. I would like your two best donuts." Peridot began scanning the rack of donuts in front of her. Absolutely none of them looked appetizing. Especially not the ones Sadie picked.

"Hey, have we met? You sound familiar..." Sadie leaned over the counter after placing the bag of obviously random donuts on top of it.

 _Wait, I hadn't had the makeup on at that point. What if the Crystal Gems had told her about me! What if The Sadie had told them! 'This weird green person was hanging around, kinda looked like that gem you described to me in great detail.' If she figures out we are one and the same, it would be a disaster!_

"Uuuuuuuuhhhh…" _Oh no, not this again._

"Yeah that's it, you were the one talking to the computer. I thought you were crazy, but you don't seem so bad now. You living 'round here?" Sadie pushed the bag of donuts forward a bit. "These are yours."

"Oh, um, ah, yes. Yes I am living here now. I work at the car wash." Peridot picked up the bag and put the money on the counter, it was a miracle. Now, the sooner she could exit the sooner she coul- _Oh no_. When she turned around, Peridot saw that Steven had just walked in; and with him, the small, purple gem. An amethyst by the look of her, yet a bit too small.

"Hey Penny!" Steven ran over and raised his hand. What in the stars could he be doing? He was just standing there. Peridot waited for a moment. And then another. Human customs are some of the most baffling things she had seen. Did he want her to hit his hand? Shake it? Some humans would spit on their hands and then perform complex gestures. The thought was cringeworthy.

"Hello… Steven." The small hybrid's smile instantly shrank.

"Okay, I'll just save it for later." He put his hand in his pocket somberly before returning to his normal self. "Amethyst, this is Penny, the girl who works for my dad!" Ah, she was an amethyst. Why was she so small then? Amethysts were supposed to be quite a bit larger than that.

"Oh, really? If she's working for Greg I would have expected more… I dunno, weirdness. She looks so normal." The purple gem was trying to school her expression into looking bored, but in reality she was looking hungrily at the donuts. Not a human hunger, borne of need. It was a bit stranger than that.

Regardless of the other gem's odd manner, Peridot congratulated herself internally. The disguise was quite masterfully plain. Her hair was the only problem, blonde being the only human hair color she could maintain. But regardless, she fit right into a crowd. She had been afraid that another gem would see right through the ruse.

"So, Penny, what're you doing here?" It was Steven again, all traces of his earlier disappointment gone. Such a strange being.

"I was picking up some donuts for your father. Do you want to take them back with me?" Steven seemed to trust her, yet he was always less inquisitive towards her around Greg. Much easier to handle, not to mention his father became more distracted; more likely to leave her to her own devices. This made it much easier to get her calculations and research done, as he wouldn't be standing over her shoulder.

"Umm, sure. What about you Amethyst?" Steven and Peridot both turned their attention to the purple gem, only to find that she had snuck behind them to go and order a dozen donuts of her own. _How could a gem manage to eat so much?_ She had just received the box and already she was scarfing down handfuls of the disgusting things. It made Peridot tun a deeper shade of green underneath the makeup.

The amethyst swallowed the doughy mass before replying. "Sure dude. Whatever you-" She paused to stuff her face again. "wann oo." She finished around the chewed donut in her mouth. _Oh stars, it's too terrible to look…_ _and I had thought that it was disgusting when humans ate.  
_  
The trio left the donut shop after saying goodbye to Sadie and began the walk back towards the 'It's a Wash'. They walked in silence for a moment before Steven's facial expression became one of intense thinking. He had a very distinctive thinking-expression.

"Hey, Penny. Why don't I see you more around the city? It's like you spend all your time at the car wash."

"Oh, um, well. I don't get out much?" _Egh, not terribly convincing. And why did I pose it as a question? That made it sound like I want to converse with the young gem-human... An utterly ridiculous notion._

"Don't you like, have a home to go back to? Friends to see? You know, human junk." Amethyst decided to insert herself into the conversation now that she had finished her 'meal'.

"Well... " She froze. If she told them she did have a life, Steven would be curious as to why she doesn't mention it. If she said she didn't, then he might get all humany and emotional about it. Well, at least his being humany would only disgust her, not endanger her mission. "No. I do not have a house, nor do I have many friends."

The other gems stopped in their tracks. Steven's mouth was agape, and Amethyst… was eating a donut. Which she had somehow managed to steal from the pair Peridot had bought.

"But Penny, how can you not have friends?! You're so cool!" Where could he have possibly gotten the impression that she was 'cool'?! She had made a conscious attempt to be both bland and uncharismatic! "And where do you stay if you don't have a house? Where do you sleep?" _Oh no._ She had been wrong. Now he was being both humany and curious. _Great._

"Well… I just haven't had a chance… to meet many people? And I don't have a um… Real estate agent! That's it. I don't have a real estate agent yet. But I will soon. So you don't have to worry." Once again her social knowhow had helped her dodge a bullet. Just as smooth as ever. Why was he looking at her like that? What was with the overjoyed grin he was flashing between her and the ametyst?

"You know. I have a friend who was a real estate agent. Before he was rich that is." He seemed to be deceiving her, yet she could not tell how. Was he simply making up this friend, or- Wait. Where did he pull that briefcase out from? "And his name is…" He paused for dramatic effect and turned around, "TIGER MILLIONAIRE!" While his back had been turned he had slipped on a small cat nose, and now that he was facing them again he licked his hand and used it to slick back his hair. Such a disgustingly human thing to do.

"What..?" Peridot couldn't think of a better question. This was so completely bizarre. Meanwhile the amethyst had started rolling around on the ground in a fit of laughter. _What in the stars is going on here? This was insanity!_

"Come on! I have so many business connections, I can find you a house in no time!" The small human grabbed her wrist and started pulling her off into the city. This was going to be a terrible day. She could just tell.

-Several extravagant homes later-

"Steven honestly. I can in no way afford to live in any of the places you've shown me so far. In fact, I could barely rent an apartment. Your father only pays me minimum wage." The wage thing was a major hindrance to her plans, one of the few things humans complain about that she understood.

"Hey, I'm not Steven! I'm professional wrestler and millionaire Tiger… Um… Millionaire. The second millionaire is part of the name." This game was getting old, and the amethyst hadn't stopped laughing in far too long. Even while they had been attending an open house she had been snickering constantly in the background.

"Also, we should be getting back. Your father is going to be upset with me for being gone so long…" There is an Earth saying, 'Speak of the devil, and he will appear.' Peridot didn't put much stock in Earth's sayings or customs, yet this one had a strange truth to it apparently. At that very moment Greg came rushing towards them. Soaking wet.

"Penny! There you are, I've been looking all over. And.. Steven why are you a cat? Oh no, this isn't like before, right?" Greg, for some reason, had a look of absolute terror on his face.

"Oh, dad! No, I was just putting on a costume." Steven stowed the cat nose and shook his head, puffing his hair out again.

"Oh thank goodness. You had me scared for a minute there bud. Come here." Steven walked over so that his dad could pick him up and put him into a tight bearhug. "I don't know how I feel about cats in general anymore…" He put his son down on the ground and turned back to Peridot. "Now, what were you three doing out here? I expected you back at work like, an hour ago."

"Well… Steven decided tha-" The boy in question cut her off.

"Dad, Penny doesn't have anywhere to live! So we were trying to find somewhere she could stay. But they were all too expensive..." Steven's expression turned downcast and he looked at the ground in defeat.

"Penny, is this true? You never said anything… I assumed you were staying with friends or something." Greg took on a thinking expression very similar to Steven's. Just what was he planning?

The amethyst spoke next. "Well, why doesn't she come stay with us. She's like, the most harmless human I've ever seen. And it would only be for awhile." _On no. Nonono._ She could not be surrounded by gems all the time. Sooner or later they would figure out who she was. This was not going well.

"I hadn't even thought of that!" Steven was excited now, "We could be roommates!" Steven looked up at her, stars in his eyes. This was not a hole she could climb out of easily.

"I don't know guys… Pearl definitely wouldn't like it. I mean, they haven't even met." Well, at least Greg wasn't on their side.

"But that's all the more reason _to_ do it! To mess with Pearl!" Peridot had been warned that the amethyst was a troublemaker.

Steven's eyes lit up even more. "Penny said she hasn't been able to meet many people. Why don't we introduce her to everyone..." once again pausing for dramatic effect, "with a party!" She had been right. It was going to be a bad day.

-Back the car wash, a short time later-

Peridot was very nervous. Her disguise had held up against two gems so far, but the real test was about to begin. All four of the crystal gems in one room and her as quite possibly the focal point of the party; she was terrified.

 _Preparation is the name of the game. If I am ready for anything, then there's not a single thing that can go wrong... Theoretically._

It was nearly time now. One last check up. She had researched specifically for the occasion. Supposedly a 'little black dress' was the proper attire for any party you did not understand the nature of. She had changed out of the farmer's clothes she had been wearing, and had shifted her form so that she was wearing one. It was strange, not an item with practical purpose.

She was standing outside of the 'It's a Wash' now, waiting for Greg. _This feels odd, us going to the party together. It's almost like when a pair of humans go on a... On a..._ She felt a blush rise in her cheeks, damned human contamination. There's no reason for her to be embarrassed.

"Oh... Wow." Greg had chosen that moment to arrive, because _of course_. Her blush deepened.

 _Wait, he's just wearing his normal clothes... What's going on?_ Greg seemed to be stunned, was something wrong?

"You know that this is going to be a kids party, right?" He made it sound like she was dressed inappropriately. _Was this the wrong kind of dress?_ Perhaps the open back was too much. Never again would Peridot trust human fashion websites. "I mean, I think you look great, er, you, you look good... pal. I'm not, um, you know, yeah." What was Greg trying to say? He seemed to be trying to communicate two separate ideas at once; and he usually had a hard enough time with one.

"Thank you, I think?" Her response elicited a nervous laugh from her employer. Something seemed to be upsetting him, but what? _Humans are such puzzles, but puzzles nonetheless._ "Shall we go? We shouldn't waste any more time."

"Yeah," he looked relieved, "let's go."

-The Temple.-

 _Oh no._ There were a lot of humans here. Mostly everyone from the area around the boardwalk, as well as many others. Some of whom she was sure Steven had only met that afternoon while house hunting. How had he managed to get so many people in attendance? _But wait, where has Greg gone?_ She hadn't expected him to leave, and she had been so distracted by the crowd she wasn't even sure which way he had gone.

 _What am I going to do? All these people, I'll be noticed in minutes! I have to leave, but I can't. They'll know something's up!_ Her hands clamped down on the sides of her dress and she could feel the grip tighten until her knuckles were undoubtedly white. _They'll know something's up.. Maybe I can get to Steven and say I have to go…_ _But that means walking through the crowd._ The masses in front of her looked less like the few dozen or so people who were actually there, and more like a frothing, seething mass of flesh and sound. She tried to pry her hands away from her dress, but found that no matter how hard she tried the grip just got tighter. _I have to get out of here, before anyone notices._ But she couldn't turn. Whatever had come over her wouldn't let her. She lost control of her temperature, and felt it rising quickly. If this continued she was going to be sick.

"Penny?" The voice came from behind her, but she couldn't turn to find out who was speaking. The clamour around her and in her head had grown to the point that the voice was all but drowned out.

"Y-yes?" She barely managed to force the words out through her gritted teeth. Luckily it didn't look like anyone was paying much attention. Maybe it would go away if she didn't move, not that she had much choice in the matter.

The source of the voice walked around to be in front of her. It was Greg.

"Penny, you don't look so great, are you alright?" His face held a look of genuine concern. After a moment Peridot could feel a little bit of control return to her.

"I just… I can't go in. There are too many people." The green gem managed to release the side of her dress, but now she didn't know what to do with her hands, so she just crossed her arms in front of her.

"Well, let's stay here for a few minutes then." He handed her a small styrofoam cup filled with a bubbly brownish red liquid. "When you're ready we'll go inside. Or, you know, I could get them to come out here." He looked at her again, the concern still evident on his face. "You afraid of crowds?"

 _What?_ She wasn't afraid… _That's ludicrous_. No gem would be afraid of a group of humans… _But there are just, just so many of them_. Any one of them could be the one to see through her. _So many eyes, all of them looking at me, digging in like knives, and-_ She shook herself out of the downward spiral. "I guess so. It hasn't come up before."

"I used to have stage fright." Greg looked at her like what he had said was meaningful.

 _When has he had reason to be on stage? Much less be afraid of it._ The two of them walked a short ways away from the party. Some teenager with pointy white hair had turned up the music so loud they had to get farther away to hear each other.

"I didn't realize you had a history with the stage." They sat down on the sand. The ocean breeze started pulling at Peridot's hair, making the ponytail she had it in uncomfortable. She let it down and the wind picked it up instantly, the cool breeze removed any trace of the uncomfortable heat she had experienced before. "Was it for your music?"

Greg was staring at her. It was making her quickly uncomfortable. Had she done something wrong? Whatever it was he snapped out of it. "Yeah, yeah it was the music. I was never really a big hit, but it might have been going somewhere…" He seemed lost in thought, as though a puzzle he couldn't solve had presented itself. "What was I saying? Oh yeah, stage fright. Really bad. My first gig had to be cancelled because I couldn't make it out there. So my buddy Marty, he takes me aside and he says 'Greg, get your act together.' He was… not the best of friends. But then he says 'think of them like a bunch of-'" He stopped for a moment, as though pondering whether to continue. "You know what, Marty isn't someone who's advice should be passed on. Just be yourself Penny. They'll love you." He held out his hand.

 _What's going on… Why should he care… Humans are so… So…_

She took his hand.

"Thanks Greg. You're wonderful."


	3. House Party: Part 2

-Homeworld-

Peridot 5 had been waiting for far too long. It seemed as though the amethyst would never show up. The files she had consulted suggested that an amethyst would best compliment her skill set. So, she had selected the highest ranking amethyst on home world as her lieutenant; a choice she was beginning to regret.

 _If she did not have such an outstanding record I would be tempted to rethink my decision. Hopefully she'll have a reasonable explanation… which she'll tell me once she arrives._

After only a few minutes longer the amethyst rounded the corner towards the building Peridot 5 was waiting in front of. This amethyst, as with most others, was a solidly built gem. Loosely based off the jasper series, they were tall and muscular, with large manes of purple hair. This one had her hair tied back in a bushy ponytail, with an earpiece in her left ear.

"You are late." Peridot 5 made the distaste obvious in her voice. She was new to… everything, but she already knew she hated tardiness.

"Yeah, well then decommission me." The purple gem took up a position leaning against the wall. "So, what's the deal with this whole Earth thing?" Peridot 5 could already tell that working with the amethyst was going to be… irksome.

"This 'Earth thing' is a mission of vital importance. Walk with me." Peridot made her way through the threshold of the building. It was a massive hall, with data terminals lining each wall from floor to ceiling.

"What're we doing in the Chamber of Series?" The amethyst looked around wonderingly at the images displayed on the terminals; each one showed a different gem, with their programming and skill set beneath it.

"My predecessor made the fatal mistake of going in unprepared. I will not be surprised by my enemy. We are going to destroy the Crystal Gems and rescue the jasper that they have undoubtedly contained. Being the last jasper currently active she is incredibly valuable to Yellow Diamond." The pair made their way to the left wall, where four data terminals had already been pulled down. Peridot activated the one with a white oval on it.

After a moment an electronic voice started up. "Pearl. Early gem series. Discontinued. Skills include: fast knowledge consumption, remarkable reflexes, and an aptitude for bladed weapons. Threat level is low to medium."

"Well that's easy. When they discontinued the pearls they gave them to us amethysts for combat practice. I've torn up maybe a hundred pearls. One more is no problem."

The amethyst was very sure of herself, and she had a right to be. Very few gems could boast a combat record like hers. Fourteen inhabited planets and thirty-seven duels. She had never lost a battle.

"Yes. She is the least of my worries." Peridot 5 made her way to the next terminal.

"Amethyst. Special query: Prototype. Prototype amethysts are smaller and faster than the completed series, yet lack control. Skills include: Combat flexibility, shapeshifting expertise, and unpredictability. Threat level is medium to high." _Nothing unexpected there. Going by the transmissions sent from the other peridot's ship this amethyst is not particularly powerful. She was likely an imperfect model._

"These next two are what worries me..." Peridot 5 placed a hand on the terminals in question. "They seem to have figured out a sustained fusion, and an incredibly stable one at that. We must be on our guard around them."

The terminals switched on and the first one began. "Ruby. Simple gem. Skills include: Brawling and high endurance. Used for crafting more powerful gems." And then the second one. "Sapphire. Simple gem. Skills include: Speed and information consumption. Used for crafting more powerful gems."

The amethyst scoffed. "You're worried about these two wimps? They're hardly stronger than the corundum series."

Both terminals switched to a different image, a pair of garnets.

"Wait, sustained fusion as a garnet? That's insane! I've worked with garnets before. Their components are so weak they don't last for more than a minute or two before they break up under their own strength! " The purple gem was paying attention now.

"Garnet. High powered fusion. Skills include: Precognition, incredible destructive capability, and considerable combat prowess. Threat level is high to very high. Caution is recommended." The amethyst was grinning now. It had become a challenge and, just like Peridot 5 had thought, this was what would motivate her.

"And now we come to the rose quartz gem." Peridot 5 walked over to the final terminal. The rose quartz seemed to be the wildcard of this group; wild cards did not sit well with her.

"Rose Quartz…" The Terminal stopped. Was it damaged? What was taking so long? Suddenly Blue Diamond's prerecorded voice began to come out of the terminal, causing both of the gems to take a step back. "This data is confidential. No non-diamond access."

What reason could the gem in charge of internal affairs have to seal this data? They would need to consult Yellow Diamond. This was becoming interesting.

-Steven's Party, The Gem Temple, Earth-

"Thanks Greg. You're wonderful."

 _Gah! Did I just say that? What's wrong with me?_ Peridot turned her head down and away from Greg, heat was rushing into her cheeks. _Oh I am never going to live this down… Ugh, I sound so human… Something's wrong, I feel wrong._ It was like how humans describe feeling butterflies in their stomach, but without the stomach part.

"Thanks Penny, you're pretty great yourself." Greg laughed as he put a hand on her shoulder. "You ready?" She looked back up into his eyes. They still had that concerned look in them.

"Yeah... I think I am." The two of them got to their feet and dusted the sand off of themselves. "So, do you have any advice on how to talk to the gems?"

They started walking back into the party. The music was loud and there were a lot of teenagers dancing. _How does Steven know all these people? I wouldn't expect him to be part of this crowd._

"You know, I wasn't expecting all these kids." Greg had his hands close to his ears like he was barely resisting the urge to cover them. Peridot couldn't blame him. Whatever the white haired teenager was playing was not the type of music she appreciated.

It was a relief when they got to the beach house. The amethyst was nowhere to be seen, but the pearl was just inside the door, looking like she was on watch. Steven sat on the couch in the middle of the room. He had his head in his hands and a somber look on his face.

"Greg! Get in here right now!" The pearl opened the door and pulled the human in by his shirt. Peridot followed after him timidly, worried that the angry gem would lash out.

"Hey, hey come on Pearl. Is this really necessary?" Greg put up his hands and the white gem released him. "What'd I even do?" the pearl turned her back to him and turned up her nose.

"This is all thanks to you. I was assured by Steven it would only be his closest friends at this party, but obviously you invited your musical friends." She looked over her shoulder at him. It was obvious she didn't have much respect for the man.

"Pearl, those aren't my friends. I haven't even met most of them." Greg rubbed the back of his head, confused at the gems accusation. "Steven, you did only invite your friends, right?"

The young hybrid didn't respond immediately. It looked like he was weighing his options. "Well… yeah… but then Sour Cream asked if he could DJ the party, and he's pretty good, so I said that he could… I guess some other people heard about it."

The pearl covered her face with a hand. "Steven you should have asked me first. You know we don't like like having too many people here. It could be dangerous." She joined him on the couch and put a hand on his shoulder. "I was reluctant to have anyone come over for a party in the first place." Steven nodded his head in understanding.

"Pearl, if you need our help getting them out of here I'm su-" Pearl cut Greg off before he could finish.

"No Greg. I can do it myself." She made her way to the doorway that Peridot was still standing in front of. "You must be Penny. I… apologize. Steven planned this party mostly for you, and it's about to be over... Why don't you stay for dinner afterwards?"

Peridot hadn't expected the Crystal Gems to be this friendly with a human they had never met before. Maybe they were already victims to whatever she was catching. "That sounds better anyways. I'm not one for parties." _Not more eating..._

"Well that is a relief. Now excuse me. I have to go and get rid of these children." Peridot moved out of the way so Pearl could get through. She watched the white gem walk down the stairs and out into the crowd where she promptly vanished.

"What do you think she's gonna do?" That was Steven. He had moved to stand beside Peridot so that he could watch whatever was about to unfold.

"I have no idea." _I can't believe it. She didn't even look at me twice. I'm blending right in._ Peridot's nerves finally calmed down.

Greg came to stand beside the two of them. "Wait, what's that?" he pointed at a large figure that was suddenly rising up out of the crowd. It was massive, hairy, and resembled a guerrilla mixed with a dinosaur. Whatever it was, it had begun roaring and stomping about, scaring away the crowd but not hurting anyone. After the crowd was gone and the dust was cleared there were only three people left on the beach. The pearl, a girl around Steven's age, and the beast. Which after a few seconds transformed into the amethyst and began laughing uncontrollably.

"Pearl you were right that was so funny!" The amethyst kept laughing and started to roll around on the ground. "I mean, I mean, did you see their faces!?" She continued like that for at least a minute as the pearl made her way back up to the beach house.

"Well. Now that that's all settled, I must warn you I don't have any idea of how to cook… Nor do I have any desire to touch food." She looked at the small boy standing in the doorway. "Steven however, loves food. And I think that he should be the one to do it, seeing as his oversight led us to our current state of affairs..." the pearl ruffled Steven's hair as she walked past.

The young girl ran up to beach house. "Oh, I'll help you Steven. My mom taught me how to make spaghetti last week, it's really easy!"

"Hehe, thanks Connie, that sounds great!" The two children rushed of to the kitchen.

"I guess I'd better make sure they don't light themselves on fire." Greg started after the pair before stopping to look back at Peridot. "Why don't you go and talk with Pearl. I think you two might get along. Hey, kids, that is not how you turn on an oven!" He turned his attention back to the children and went over to save them from themselves.

 _Well this turned around quickly._ Peridot made her way to where the pearl was sitting, watching Steven and Connie in the kitchen. "Um, that was impressive. We certainly weren't expecting it." She sat down on the couch.

"Well, I tried to tell them to leave, but they just wouldn't listen." The pearl laughed a little, "that Sour Cream boy said 'The man can't shut us down! You'll never make a fisherman out of me!'. That bit of nonsense was the last straw." She let out a deep sigh, "Now Amethyst wants to terrorize the locals like it's one of Steven's monster movies. Egh, it's ridiculous."

"Is it always like this?" Peridot was beginning to scare herself, she was asking questions with concern that was only half fake, if that. Things were getting out of hand.

"Most of the time, yes. I really wish we could just leave… Go back to where we came from, but it's a little late for that now." She looked up at a picture on the wall, it must have been a picture of Rose Quartz, yet it looked incredibly familiar to Peridot.

 _Wait, most of the humans don't know that the gems are aliens. I should act inquisitive._ "And where is that? You don't look like the… um, locals."

"Oh, just… Haha, you know… other… places." The pearl picked up a book off the table. It was some sort of human literature on science. "Do you like science? I know I do!" The white gem was obviously desperate to change the topic of conversation.

 _So, not only do most people not know they weren't from Earth, but they actively hide the information._ Perhaps this could be used to her advantage.

Though, it seemed wrong... These people had been nothing but nice to her and she was looking for leverage against them. But… they were the enemy. They were her enemy, they were Yellow Diamond's enemy, they were all of Homeworld's enemy… but… Greg, Steven, the amethyst, and now even the pearl. They were _her_ friends. _Oh now I'm confused… What am I going to do?_

 _Get back in the moment. Soul searching will wait, I can't slip up now._ "Um, yes. I do. I have a bit of a background in it actually." _Wait, why would a minimum wage carwash employee have a background in science?!_

The pearl suddenly had a smug look on her face. "You know, most of what humans understand on the subject is incorrect." There were no functioning pearls on homeworld. One of the main reasons is thought to be their attitude. They were made to be receptacles for massive amounts of data with some combat functionality, and yet they tended to think they knew everything. It was an annoyance the Diamond Authority had sought to remove. It hadn't taken long for Peridot to understand why, and she wasn't going to take it sitting down.

"Are you referring to our misunderstanding of quantum entanglement?" The pearl froze. That _was_ what she had meant. _Wait, I can't do this now. I may be smarter than her, but as a human I have no right to be. Let's just leave it here. We don't need to breed suspicion._

"Finally a human with some sense! I've been dying to talk with someone about this." _Well this is unexpected_. " It's been years since I've been able to discuss high level theory in any form. In fact I have this idea that…

-Three hours, a 'delicious' dinner, two more hours, and finally a short discussion on the feasibility of intergalactic wormhole travel later-

Greg and Peridot were walking back to the 'It's a Wash'. Connie's parents had agreed to let her stay over, and Pearl (Peridot had decided that this gem had earned the right to be considered more than just another pearl) had been called off on gem business, so they had decided that it was a good time to leave. They were walking in silence, but that didn't really bother Peridot. The walk, however, proved far too short for how pleasant it was. The green gem was really beginning to like the bearded man. He was goofy, and sunburnt, and he needed to stop living in a van. Sure, those were all true, but he was just so perfectly… himself. There was nothing disingenuous about him. And she loved that. You couldn't find someone who wasn't lying or vying for a new rank on Homeworld. It just didn't happen. On Earth though, you had… Wait. She what? _Loved?_ This wasn't good.

 _I have to… I have to get away, I have to think._ She had stopped walking as they neared the car wash. Then she took a step back. She had to go.

"Penny?" Greg turned to see her standing there, trapped by conflicting emotions. "Penny you look like a deer caught in the headlights. What happened?"

 _I need to leave… NOW!_ She turned and she ran. Within steps the night swallowed her up like she was never even there. She kept running. She ran until she was out of the city. She ran until… _Oh… it's the view again._ She was back on the hill. The hill where she had been spending her nights. Where she'd been planning her takeover, but… had she really been doing that? She'd found the beginnings of her communication device, but she hadn't even started building it. She also hadn't moved. She hadn't found somewhere that the gems wouldn't be able to stop her. What she had been doing was sitting there with Greg's song running through her head.

 _What am I doing? I had a plan… I had a goal… but it just, it doesn't matter anymore. I never felt like this on Homeworld. Never felt like what I was doing, I was doing because it was what I, Peridot, wanted to do. But here…_ She let herself fall backwards into the grass. Then she let this form melt away. Her limbs bulked out, her hair triangulated, and her glasses morphed back into her visor. She was herself again. No deception. Now, she had to think. Thinking is what Peridots are made for. _My mission was to rescue Jasper. That mission would never succeed; the two of us couldn't take on the Crystal Gems once, and there's no way we could do it now. There is no way that I could escape; an attempt to get off of this planet would most likely result in my destruction. I simply do not have the facilities to construct a ship. I… I could always stay? I haven't been found out yet, and it is possible I could win the trust of the Crystal Gems, then reveal myself and join them. That would mean betraying Yellow Diamond… Any other option would mean betraying Greg…_

Peridot sat up. She had made her decision. Looking back she had made it as soon as she had heard Greg's song. She couldn't leave them, and she couldn't stay if she was loyal to Yellow Diamond. It was time to- _Oh. They're already gone._ She had looked down, ready to morph away the insignias of Yellow Diamond that emblazoned her outfit, yet they were already gone. She had subconsciously replaced with stars. _I suppose that means it's official._

 _From here on out, I don't work for Yellow Diamond or Homeworld. I will no longer plot the downfall of humanity, and I will no longer try to rescue Jasper. Besides, Jasper can take care of herself._

-The Bottom of the Ocean-

No room to move. No light to see. No air to scream.

Malachite's chains were like cold iron. They dug into her wrists and froze her skin. With every passing moment she came closer to forgetting why they were there. A battle raged inside of her, one side fighting to retain the memory, the memory of the little boy who had saved her, whom she had owed and failed. The other side fought to replace the memory with that of the boy who had destroyed their only chance at redemption. Both sides were powerful, but what is debt compared to this burning hatred? With every passing second Lapis Lazuli could feel control slipping through her fingers like the waters she commanded. With every passing second Jasper could feel the fire inside her bringing life back to the cold stone corpse that Malachite had become. The ocean gem was out of time.

One. Two. Three. Four eyes wide open. Malachite was awake.

 **A/N:**

Expect some action next time!


	4. Beach City Brawl

**A/N:**

 **Wow, this took waaaaay too long to get done. I may not put out another one until after stevenbomb, or I might put out a short one. Either way, enjoy!**

"Steven. Hey Steven!" The boy was startled awake by Connie calling for him.

Steven let out a yawn. "Hey Connie, what's up?" He sat up on the mattress that had been placed beside his bed to see that his friend was stuck, her legs pinned beneath Lion.

"Can you move him? I woke up and he's just laying here like a big pink comforter." She tried to push the large feline again. "A comforter stuffed with lead."

"Aw, Connie he's just _lion_ down for a bit, and this is the _pur_ fect place for a nap." His puns were not amusing her, but that wasn't really anything new.

"Steven I'm being serious. Help me push! Also, Lions don't pur." She redoubled her efforts, and this time Steven helped as well, finally rolling the beast off of his friend and onto the floor.

The two of them stood up and looked at each other for a moment before breaking out into giggles. Steven was the first to recover. "Let's go find Amethyst. She said she'd make muffins for breakfast!"

"Ooh, I love muffins!" The pair ran over to the temple door and knocked on it. There was no response, yet the smell of smoke wafted towards them from the kitchen.

"She didn't..." Steven turned to see that there was a small cloud of smoke beginning to billow out of the stove. "AMETHYST!" He ran towards the stove and flung it open. The fire roared outwards for a moment before Connie ran over and grabbed the fire extinguisher. It took only a second for the foam to douse to flames.

"Well. At least they didn't look good to begin with." She looked and the burned mess in the stove. "Cranberry... and nacho?" The children looked at each other and stuck out their tongues simultaneously.

"Do you want waffles instead?" Steven turned the heat off on the stove. "I think we have some." He went to the cupboard and fished out the box. Upon inspecting its contents he found only crumbs. "Looks like Amethyst had a morning snack..."

"Where is she anyways?" Connie poked her head outside to look for their babysitter. "Nothing but sand on the beach."

Steven rested his head in his hand, deep in thought. "Well, I do have two detective costumes… and this is a mystery... but we should eat first. Pearl says that your brain works faster once you've eaten."

"But there isn't anything here... Want to go see if your dad'll feed us breakfast? He's a better cook than Amethyst anyways."

"Okay. Let's bring the costumes with us, just in case a clue presents itself." He pulled two victorian-style detective costumes out of the cupboard under the stairs, along with a fake mustache. "Hm, I already had a beard once. Facial hair isn't really my style."

"Ooh, i've always wanted a mustache!" Connie held the fuzzy lip cover up to her face "What do you think, dashing?"

Steven chuckled. "It's like a caterpillar crawled up on your face."

"Well, I like it." The girl smoothed down the false facial fluff.

With that, the pair of young sherlocks left without even noticing the hastily written note taped to the countertop.

-It's a Wash, a short while later-

Steven and Connie walked up to the carwash to see Greg hard at work… sleeping on a lawn chair. "Hey dad." The boy called out to his father as they approached, rousing him from his sleep.

"O-oh hey kids. What's up with those funky costumes?" Greg pulled himself up to a sitting position.

"We're detectives. We couldn't find Amethyst, so we're on the lookout for clues. Clues and breakfast!" Steven and Connie took up seats in the other lawn chair.

"Well, I'm sure I have something…" Greg chuckled as he got up and walked over to his van. After a few moments of rummaging he pulled out a box of toaster strudels. "My toaster is in the carwash, just gimme a minute." Greg got out of the van and walked into his place of business.

The two children sat patiently for a moment until Connie noticed something moving at the other end of the carwash. "Steven, is that…?" Connie left the end of her sentence hang as she pointed at the (somewhat) stealthy figure.

When Steven turned his head towards where she was pointing, he saw that it was Penny sneaking towards them, looking very nervous. "Hey Penny!" Steven called, causing the blonde to jump in surprise and put a shushing finger to her lips.

"Steven!" She whispered loudly, "I-I'm trying to get in without Greg noticing, is he… is he in there?"

"Yeah, he's making us strudels." Steven grinned at the woman, for some reason bringing out an almost sick look of nervousness on her face.

"Well, if he's in there…" She took a deep breath. "Can you two stay out here? I need to…" Now she was blushing. _She's acting really weird, I wonder what's wrong._ She continued.

"I need to ask him something. Just stay out here for a minute." With that she turned and went inside the carwash.

"Is something going on?" Connie was concerned as well. Steven didn't really have an answer for her. Something was up, but between adults just being generally confusing, and him being still rather hungry, he not didn't have much of an idea what it was, but also wasn't prepared to form one.

"We'll find out later. For now I just want some breakfast." Steven crossed his arms in irritation. It seemed like nothing was going their way this morning. Suddenly, the water began to lap at the shore more aggressively, causing Steven and Connie to forget about their breakfasts and jump out of their seats to check it out.

"Whoa, Steven that water looks very strange… Is this more gem stuff?" Connie was obviously both scared and excited at the prospect.

"I don't know… Maybe Lapis is doing it, like before." He took a step forward, only to have the water rush forward as though to strike him.

"Steven!" It was Pearl. Steven turned just as she threw a spear into the water surging towards him, splattering it into droplets.

As though on cue the water of the beach started bubbling up as though it was boiling. Frothing, seething, _alive._ A massive gem burst forth from the tumultuous waves. It was Malachite, the massive fusion of Lapis Lazuli and Jasper. "Fighting me in my own element, do you gems have a deathwish?!" The gem laughed as she started charging towards them, the animosity visible in her eyes even from this distance.

"Not so fast!" Shouted an injured Amethyst as she leapt out of the ocean after her quarry, wrapping her whip around one of Malachites limbs. This caused the fusion to trip up. "Get her Garnet!"

"On it!" Garnet flew out of the water fist first and slammed her gauntlet right into the jaw of Malachite. The attack didn't seem to bother the more powerful gem, who simply laughed it off and grabbed both Garnet and Amethyst in her massive hands, lifting the two of them easily.

"Pearl! Get them out of here! We... We've got this!" Amethyst twisted in Malachite's tightening grip.

"Steven, you two have got to leave!" The pale gem pulled her weapon out of the sand. "Greg can get you out of here I'm sure, but I have to stay with Garnet and Amethyst. They need me." With that she turned back towards the monstrous gem and threw her spear like a javelin before summoning another and moving to engage her enemy.

"Steven, should we go? This fight looks even more one sided than the last one I saw." Connie took a step back but didn't turn, didn't run away.

"The gems, they need me!" The boy took a step forward, but his friend grabbed onto his sleeve, stopping him before he could go.

"You really think you can take that thing?" The fear on her face was a strange counterpart to her fake mustache.

"Of course we can! We always find a way." Steven smiled at his friend and she relinquished her grip on his sleeve.

"Okay... If you're sure." She smiled and gave him a thumbs up, trying to hide her fear, "Go get her."

Steven nodded before rushing towards Malachite. He saw that Lion was charging her from her other side. "Lion, sword!" Steven called to his pet, who roared in return as Rose's sword flew out of his glowing mane and into the air.

Steven leapt into the air, catching the sword at the apex of its flight before slamming it into one of Malachite's arms as he descended. The sudden wound caused the fusion to release the two captured members of Crystal Gems from her grasp, letting them fall to the ground.

"Steven!?" Pearl, who had not yet been caught, yelled furiously as she darted to evade Malachite's blows. "You were supposed to run away!" She was caught off guard by a sudden strike from a water tendril.

"I'm getting TIRED of this!" Malachite shouted before using her powers to pull up a wave and wash the Crystal Gems away from her.

"We aren't even makin' a dent!" Garnet slammed her first into the ground in frustration.

"What are we gonna do? Nothing we throw at her works." Amethyst summoned another whip to replace the one the wave had washed away.

"Just keep fightin'. She isn't' invincible... I think." Garnet said as all four gems got to their feet, bruised, but not beaten.

"Close as they come." Malachite smiled maliciously before rounding on the gems, a near insane laugh breaking from her lips as she charged forward.

The gems prepared their defensive stance, weapons raised; but it wasn't enough. Malachite created more tendrils from the water, and the assault was more than they could take. The fight was quick and brutal. Amethyst was taken down after failing to block one of Malachite's fists, Pearl was grabbed by the water and took a hard hit in the gut, and Garnet was finally downed when Malachite trapped her head in an orb of water and increased the pressure to a point that not even Garnet could take.

Malachite then rounded on Steven; circling him like a predator. "Look how quickly the mighty Crystal Gems fall before me. Nothing can stop me now, Steven. You may not be Rose Quartz, but I'll make you _and_ the rest of this miserable planet pay for what she did to me. To all of homeworld! " She swung a punch at him that he barely managed to roll under, then threw a massive uppercut. A hit. One that would have taken him right in the jaw if his bubble hadn't triggered.

"NO!" Steven yelled as the force of the attack propelled him away from the fight back towards the carwash. He saw his friends had all retreated into their (luckily) unharmed gems as Malachite laughed loudly.

"You never even had a chance!" Malachite picked up the three gems. "Wait… where did he go?"

His impact with the 'It's a Wash' sign was sudden. His bubble popped and gravity took him plummeting towards the ground, only to be caught by a pair of surprisingly strong arms.

"Penny?" Steven looked up at the blonde. There was a strange glow on her forehead... The two of them ducked into the carwash where an unconscious Greg and Connie were laying on the floor seemingly unharmed.

"Steven. There's no way you can take her on alone." Penny took his hand and squeezed. She was shaking. "Together we might have a chance." Steven had never seen her this serious before. He also hadn't noticed how green her eyes were before now... "Fuse with me."

"Wait, fuse with you?" Steven looked down to see a glow starting to emanate from his gem. "How?"

Penny helped the boy to his feet and took his other hand as well. "You know how."

The two of them began dancing. Though awkward at first due to the lack of music, it took only a few moments for Steven to catch the beat to the song in her head.

"Hey, I know this song…" was the last thing Steven said on his own before a glow overtook the both of them.

When the glow dissipated, gone were the boy and the woman. In their place stood a tall, four-armed, blue gem. She wore a visor, jean shorts, flip flops, and a pink crop top with a star in the center.

 _Wow… I'm surprised. I feel pretty good._ She checked out her arms. The top pair ended in bulky, mechanical looking forearms with floating fingers instead of hands, while the other set was more human, although larger. She ran her human hands over her hair. _Triangular, yet stylishly unkempt. Not bad me, not bad._ Jasper's calls broke her out of her self-admiration.

"Come on out Steven! Your friends don't have much more time!" She could hear Malachite calling to her. Well, half of her. It was time to see what they were capable of together, what _she_ was capable of. She adjusted her visor. _Let's do this._

She rushed out of the building; surprisingly fast, but she was thinking even faster. By the time Malachite saw her she was already firing off a volley of blasts with the plasma cannon that her upper arms had turned into, _and_ summoned her shield with the lower pair.

"Who in the world are _you_?!" The blasts barely seemed to tickle the colossal gem.

"I'm…" She had to think about that one for a second. "I'm Azurite. Now you."

Azurite smiled. She had a plan to make the other gem angry. If her opponent could be driven to make mistakes, _then_ she might have a chance.

"What do you mean?! I'm Malachite! I am the most powerful gem on this miserable rock!" The crazed grin had returned to the other fusion's face.

"Past tense _._ "

"What?"

"You meant to say you _WERE_ the most powerful gem on _Earth_." She pointed a floating thumb at herself. "Because now, I 'm here." _She's gonna kill me… or at least try._

"Y- I'll kill you!" Malachite charged forward furiously, an orb of water in each of her top hands.

"Just try it!" the new fusion leapt right over the other as the larger gem charged her, firing off a few blasts from her cannon as she did so. _Lapis' gem is in her back… Maybe I can pull it out._

"RARGH! Let's see what you say once I rip you in half!" Malachite pitched one of the water orbs, it split into a thousand darts in midair, each moving fast enough to punch through concrete. Azurite saw it coming and raised her shield, but that left her unable to dodge when Malachite's fist suddenly pounded against the blue disk.

"You've got quite the arm…but how are you at catching?" Azurite flipped backwards as another of Malachite's fists came at her, putting some distance between the two of them. _I've got the speed and the brains, but brawn lay solely with her._ She readied her cannon and aimed it steadily. _These shots won't hurt her alone… I need something else that I can hit her with…_

"Are you not gonna shoot?! You can't say that line and then _NOT_ shoot!" Malachite looked even cockier now. "You're quite the amatuer. I think you need some lessons." She rushed forward and Azurite saw that Rose's sword was still imbedded in her arm. Maybe she could use that?

"Lesson one." One of the monstrous gem's huge fists slammed into Azurite's shield, "Only pick fights," she raised another fist "you can win!" The attack pounded against the shield harder than the blue gem was expecting, this time sending her sliding back across the sand and causing the shield to flicker for a second; it was taking too much punishment.

"Lesson two," Malachite spread her top arms wide, "learn from your enemies!" She swung both fists like hammers, one on either side of Azurite, but the smaller gem was faster and just managed to roll under the larger one's legs before the fists connected. The shockwave of the impact made a crater in the ground beneath it, and briefly stunned the attacker.

"I'll just take this." Azurite pulled the sword out of Malachite's leg and rolled out from underneath her before the larger gem could react.

"You little worm! I'll crush you!" The ocean began to surge upwards towards the clouds, a towering wall of water; impossibly high, sparkling in the morning sun. Malachite laughed madly as the water reached ever higher. "Come on, beg me for mercy."

Azurite stood up straight and looked Malachite in the eyes. _We need a distraction_. She let Steven's personality rise up to the surface of their shared consciousness. "Buddies don't treat other buddies like this…" Steven spoke while Peridot thought. _If I break her concentration then I can remove the gem without damaging it._ "Isn't that right, Lapis?"

"ArgaARgHGarA!" Both of Malachites top arms went to her face, the water wall began to tremble. "Don't call me that! She's... she's gone! Now… now…" The wall steadied again as the huge gem looked Azurite straight in the eyes, revealing that her two pairs had started glowing bright yellow. "I'm just angry!"

 _That wasn't what I was going for._ The nimble gem barely dodged the unbelievably fast barrage of punches Malachite sent her way as she readied her sword. "Well, if you're going to be like this…" Azurite fired off a plasma blast before following it up with several swashing blows, all of which cut into Malachite's arms.

"Back to teaching! Lesson three," Malachite caught Azurite by the arm after her last attack and grinned, "don't make me angry!" A massive fist to the face sent the smaller gem flying into the wall of water. Upon impact it wrapped itself around her limbs: she wasn't getting out of this. "Let's raise the stakes, shall we?!" Malachite climbed into the vertical sea and the two of them began rising up into the sky.

"I want to show you this city before I crush it. I want you to hear all of it's people scream as my tower crashes down on them, them and all of your friends laying in the sand." Malachite seemed pleased with herself, yet the plan was needlessly time consuming and roundabout. _If she were really in full control, the Jasper I know would never do this, she's too on-task… Maybe Lapis is still in there somewhere._

Finally the two of them reached the top. Azurite was lifted up by liquid arms and turned towards the city. People had begun to congregate near the base of the wall. If it crashed it would take all of them with it.

"Now, prepare!" Malachite raised one of her arms, the tower began to tilt towards the city.

 _These bonds, I have to break them. If I vent my cannons then the heat should evaporate them, but it will only buy a moment, I'll have to act fast._ She started heating up her weapons. _I need to wait for the moment when she thinks she's won._

"Final lesson," Malachite walked over and grabbed Azurite by the chin, "learn to lose with dignity." She grinned maliciously and laughed as the tower started to fall over.

 _Now!_ The smaller fusion vented her cannons, boiling and evaporating the water as planned, and taking the larger gem by surprise. She slammed Rose's sword into Malachite's chest, eliciting a cry of rage from her foe.

"Thank you for the lessons," Azurite used the sword as a grip to fling herself over the larger gem, landing squarely on her back, "but I'm afraid," she gripped the sides of the teardrop stone imbedded in her foe's back tightly, "that the student has surpassed the teacher!" _Really, that's the line I come up with?!_ The blue gem pulled as hard as she could. The ocean tower began to shake and split, with chunks starting to plummet downwards. Malachite slipped off the edge as her footing became unstable, taking Azurite, who was still trying to pull Lapis free, with her.

"NO! WE CANNOT LOSE! WE ARE THE STRONGEST!" The gem started to come loose as tears began welling in Malachite's eyes, "I can't fail, not again..." Any trace of Lapis' voice was gone as their forms split apart. Lapis Lazuli quickly reformed in Azurite's arms, stopping the water mid descent.

"I-I'm free… really free!" Lapis took to the wing, but Azurite didn't have time to watch; Jasper was still plummeting, and so was she. The fusion angled her body like a spear, making herself more aerodynamic and gaining on Jasper. Once she was within arms reach she grabbed the orange gem by the hair and pulled her into a tight embrace. _I really wish I didn't care this much…_ The two of them impacted the ground, barely saved by Azurite's always timely bubble.

"You… you saved me... WHY?!" Jasper was on her feet now, though just barely. "So you can taunt me before you end it?!" She adopted a halfhearted fighting stance, obviously meaning to see this through to the end.

"I couldn't let you die. That isn't how we do things." Azurite was fading fast. She had used too much power in the fight and didn't know how much more her fusion could take.

"You Crystal Gems are just weak. You can't even stomach the war you started!" Jasper had a very sceptical look on her face.

"No, we're just strong enough to do what's right." Jasper was shocked for a moment, but then looked like she was going to keep talking. Azurite cut in before she could. "You talk too much." She fired a stunning pulse from her cannon. It would knock Jasper out without hurting her any more than was necessary; similar in concept to what half of her had used on Connie and Greg earlier, yet closer in design to one of Homeworld's destabilizers.

Lapis, having just finished putting the ocean back, flew over to where Azurite now knelt. "Thank you… Steven? Are you… in there?" Lapis looked quizzically at the larger gem.

"Yeah, he's part of me…" The crowd of humans was running towards them. "I need to go. You take the Crystal Gems and Jasper into the temple. Jasper should be passed out for at least a day. I gave her twice the maximum recommended dosage."

"Of stun gun?" Lapis raised an eyebrow.

"Like I said, I've got to go." Azurite started to run off, but paused after a few steps. "To repay me for saving you, you can have breakfast ready when I get back." She then took off in the opposite direction of the humans.

Once they were out of sight she stopped running and took up a hiding place behind a large rock. "I'm gonna miss being me… I'll have to do it again sometime." And with that she relinquished the fusion and separated.

The two gems sat behind the rock. Peridot had assumed her natural form again, and Steven looked normal as well. "Peridot?"

"Yes, Steven?"

"You're pretty secretive..." He took a moment to mull over his thoughts. "But now, I think you're one of the good guys." He held his hand out for her to shake.

"Thank you Steven, but I don't think I'm ready for that just yet." She put her hand on his. "Can you promise not to tell the gems or your father about me?"

Steven nodded slowly. "Yeah. I can trust you." The two of them just sat there for a moment. "You're good at hiding your thoughts Peridot… I couldn't tell what you were thinking sometimes."

Peridot smiled a little bit. "Yes, I have some thoughts I'd rather you not see, even while we're fused. But I promise it isn't anything bad."

Steven stood up and looked back towards the temple. "What're we gonna do now?"

"Well," Peridot dusted herself off as she rose, "I'm going to go pretend that Penny has been unconscious with your father and Connie this entire time."

Peridot was just turning to leave when Steven spoke up behind her. "Peridot?"

"Steven?" She turned to see that he was looking right up into her eyes.

"Friends?"

Peridot chuckled nervously and scratched the back of her head before responding. "Yes, we're friends."


	5. Buddies Again

**A/N:**

 **I will now address the cannon of the stevenbomb episodes of this fic.**

 **Sworn to the sword - Yes. Rising tides/Crashing skies - Yes. We need to talk - Yes. Keeping it together - No. (Though don't forget it) Chille Tid - Yes or no, whichever you prefer. After this I doubt any homeworld plotline episodes will work, so I may only do this the once.**

-Homeworld-

Peridot 5 and the amethyst were walking through the glorious Authority Plaza. It was something of a garden, yet with all the flora replaced by statues. They did not, unfortunately, have time to stop and admire the likenesses of their rulers; they had a meeting with the real deal.

"I still don't really understand. Why haven't we recruited a team yet? So what if the rose quartz file is missing?" The amethyst had not stopped prattling on about this over the last several days, and Peridot 5 was tired of having to explain it to her. _How thick is she?_

"I will not lead a mission I cannot be sure will succeed. Also, I am troubled by the absence of relevant data." The truth was that Peridot 5 had been mulling on the ramifications of Blue Diamond hiding this information non-stop.

The two gems made the rest of the trip through the plaza in silence. The amethyst was clearly not amused by their situation, though not nearly as troubled as Peridot 5 thought she ought to be.

The palace of the Authority was a magnificent spectacle to behold; massive steel spires and magnificent marble buildings covered a vast swath of land to form the home of the strongest gems in all of the universe. Once inside, a small corundum gem approached them.

"Ah, Captain Peridot and Lieutenant Amethyst. Follow me please." She beckoned for the pair to follow as she turned to walk down an immaculate blue-tiled hallway. "The Diamond has been expecting you, she said you were very important guests; I am, of course, suitably honored to be in your presence, as you will be in hers." One part flattery, one part mockery, and two parts warning. _A strange little gem._

The three of them arrived at a massive set of azure double doors. _Something isn't right here, why is everything so-_

Her thought was cut off by the smaller gem slamming the doors open and introducing, "Her authoritative majesty, Blue Diamond!"

There she sat, upon her throne of chiseled slate, the spitting image of her sister. The only difference being her colouration, and an eyepatch on her left eye. "Good morning. Won't you two come in for a chat?"

-Beach City, Earth-

Peridot had been pretending to be unconscious for nearly an hour; it was time to get up. The disguised gem sat up and looked around the carwash. Greg was still snoring in his sleep, and Connie's hair seemed to have formed a pillow that her head was now resting on. The two of them looked so peaceful laying there on the floor that Peridot almost didn't want to wake them. Almost. She had been laying on the floor waiting for far too long.

"Greg..." She tried again, louder this time. "Greg!" Still no response... had he been given too high powered a blast from her stun gun? "GREG!" The shout was enough to rouse him from his slumber.

"Gah! What's going on?!" He looked around rapidly, whipping his head back and forth as though searching for something. "Huge gem, very angry," Greg looked back to the only other conscious person in the room, "what happened?"

"Don't worry," Peridot laid a hand on the man's shoulder, "the gems beat it."

"And Steven?"

"He's safe."

"Oh thank goodness." Greg collapsed backwards. "This gem stuff gets scarier all the time. I hate not being able to help."

Peridot thought she understood how Greg felt... Until becoming Azurite she had always let her comrades down by never being able to stomach a face to face fight. The stakes were too high for her to take, too much stress. But with Steven... "He's very brave."

Greg was a little confused. "Who is?"

"Steven. I... I saw some of the fight." The two of them stood up and dusted themselves off.

"He is quiet the kid. I'm just worried it's all a bit much for him. I know it is for me." Greg looked over at Connie laying unconscious on the ground. "Oh Connie!" He rushed over to the girl and gently shook her awake.

"W-where'd Steven go? I was just watching the gems and him fight that monster, and then," She mimed what looked like a puff of smoke, "poof."

"Yeah, sorry kiddo. It looks like you, Penny, and I all missed most of the action." He helped the girl to her feet. "Penny says that Steven and the Crystal Gems won in the end though, so I really don't mind missing the fight."

"Well, we still need to make sure they're all alright!" Connie started off, pulling Greg behind her.

"Okay, okay, I agree with you." Greg started walking of his own free will. "Jeez kid, you've got a firm grip." He rubbed his hand as though it was sore, though Peridot was certain it wasn't actually.

Peridot started after them, but the trio stopped when they saw the massive orb of water on the beach. It was obviously one of Lapis' constructs. There was a massive crowd gathered in front of it, mostly TV crews and the like.

"We need to get in there." Greg's words brought Peridot's attention back to their small group. "If that's the blue gem from before, who knows if Steven is safe in there." He put a hand on the leg Lapis had broken previously, remembering the fight.

"I…" Peridot trusted Lapis, she had spoken with her many times on Homeworld and on the trip to Earth. The two of them were not quite friends, but they got along well enough. None of this could possibly be true for the character of Penny however, so she replied in kind. "I agree. We must… f-force our way through." She rolled up her sleeves. Any courage that remained from her fusion with Steven was gone. This many people would not be good for her.

"Yeah, let's get in there!" Connie ran off, using her small size to nimbly weave through the crowd, a feat that neither Greg nor Peridot could hope to emulate.

A firm hand wrapped itself around the disguised-gem's own. It was Greg. "I remember you don't like crowds, but you don't have to worry. I've got you." He smiled wide, just the way Steven did.

"Oh, Greg…" A blush was already burning it's way across Peridot's face, and butterflies had started building inside her. "Alright. Let's go."

The two of them started shouldering their way through the half afraid, half curious masses. They were careful not to harm any of the gawkers, yet still set on their goal. It must have been the entire city _and_ the surrounding area that had congregated here, in addition to the variety of news stations with their crews present. This was actual alien stuff. Everyone knew that it happened, but it was rare for it to be so non-life threatening that people could just come and look.

There were three people at the front of the crowd that Peridot recognized. Connie was there, banging on the side of the orb trying to get in, the eldest son of the fryman family, wearing strange military looking gear that's natural air of authority was countered by the fact that he was continually snapping pictures on his phone, and the mayor, who was just standing there biting his nails and sweating.

"Greg!" It was the mayor who spoke up first. "Does this have something to do with your son and his… erm, guardians?"

"Guardians… Oh, you mean the gems! Yeah, yeah it does."

"Good. I need you to tell me something reassuring, so I can tell the citizens something reassuring. We can't have this end up as another evacuation." He adjusted his tie nervously as he eyed the thick crowd all around him.

The Fryman boy spoke up next. "And if you have any details on what sort of alien thing is doing this, then I could really use them for my blog."

"For your what?" Greg looked at the teenager in confusion before turning his attention back to the mayor. "Well, apparently our side won the fight, so just… I don't know, tell them that."

"Well, okay. Thanks for that, Universe." The mayor pulled out his megaphone, but before starting his speech he turned to Greg again. "Just so you know, if this goes wrong, you're my scapegoat."

Peridot didn't pay attention to the mayor's speech. Instead she went over to Connie, who was still banging fruitlessly on the orb. "I don't think brute force is going to work."

"Well then, what _do_ you think is going to work?" The small girl's arms fell to her sides in defeat.

"Did you try knocking?"

"Knocking?"

"Yes, isn't that what I said?" Human speech patterns and customs were still alien to Peridot. Why not simply answer the question?

Connie lifted up a fist and knocked on the side of the orb three times. Nothing happened for a moment, then all of a sudden the water reached out and pulled her, Peridot, and Greg inside.

Within the bubble were Lapis and Steven. The former had her arms extended and her eyes were glowing. It was obviously taking a toll on her to keep this orb in place this long while she was still this weak. The latter was holding five gemstones in his arms. It seemed none of the Crystal Gems or Jasper had regenerated yet. Probably for the best.

"Lapis, what are you doing?!" Peridot hissed at her quietly while Connie and Greg rushed over to Steven's side.

"I don't know, I panicked! Wait… who are you?!"

Peridot grumbled to herself before responding. This disguise was becoming a pain. "It's me, Peridot." She whispered in the blue gem's ear.

"Oh!" Lapis' eyes began to dim their glowing. "If I lower this, will the humans attack me?"

"The likelihood of them doing that increases the longer you keep this up. Also, what happens when one of the Crystal Gems regenerates to see this?" She took a step towards the group of humans. "Be prepared to fly, but meet me outside of the city tonight, after sundown." Lapis only nodded in response, but it was all the answer Peridot needed. Their meeting was set.

"Penny, you're here!" Steven looked up at her. He had the mischievous glint in his eye that told he was keeping a secret. He was enjoying this.

"Yes Steven. Now, are the gems alright?" She looked at the stones in his hands, nothing seemed wrong with them. _That's quite the relief._

"Yeah… Now I'm just worried about getting out." Steven looked over at the ocean gem, she was still holding up the water.

"Well, at least you're safe, kiddo." Greg pulled his son into a tight embrace. After a moment Connie joined the hug as well.

"We were worried you'd gotten hurt!" The girl looked at Steven seriously, moustache somehow still in place.

"No, I'm fine, and I'm sure-" Steven was cut off by Lapis suddenly letting the orb disappear. She stood there for a moment, amidst the crowd of humans, unsure of herself. Then the people surrounding them charged forwards with microphones and questions; she took to the sky. "Lapis!" Steven called after her, but she flew on uninterrupted until she was out of sight.

-The Temple, an hour of interviews later-

Peridot was exhausted. She'd just spent an hour stumbling over answers to questions that never seemed to stop. The only reason she hadn't left before was that she couldn't bear to push her way through the crowd. Now Greg, Steven, Connie, and her were all in the beach house where Steven and the Crystal Gems lived.

"Hey, Penny. You want to help me cook up something for the kids? They never did get their breakfast today." Peridot followed Greg into the kitchen where he began taking various food items out of the fridge.

"I'm afraid I don't know how to cook… at all." Peridot not only couldn't cook, she also didn't feel comfortable touching food that was just going to slide down someone's throat in a few minutes.

"Well you know science, right?" He put a metal pan onto the stove and turned on the heat.

"Um, well... yes. Specifically engineering, but what's your point?" She raised an eyebrow at the man.

"Cooking is just like science." He put down a large metal bowl and began pouring flour into it. "I'm a little bit rusty, but I used to cook for Rose all the time." Once he deemed there was enough flour in the bowl he started mixing in other ingredients, such as milk, eggs, and sugar.

"What are you making now?" She peered at the disgusting mixture. To a human it may have looked appetizing, but Peridot had no idea.

"Just pancakes, nothing fancy." He took the bowel and began pouring the mixture into little splotches in the pan he had previously set on the stove.

"I must admit. It does not smell terrible."

Greg laughed. "Well why would it?"

"I just never took you for a cook." The pancakes were beginning to brown in what, according to Greg's expression, was what they were supposed to do.

"Appearances can be deceiving." Peridot looked away, _you have no idea_.

He took the first few cakes out of the pan and laid them on two plates. He then put a small cube of butter and a decent amount of syrup on top of each of them. "Wanna take these out to the kids?"

"Oh, of course." She picked up the pair of plates and placed them on the table in front of the young humans.

"Breakfast at last!" Cried Steven before digging in.

"Thank you Penny, and Mr. Universe!"

Peridot chuckled, she was finding these children more and more charming.

Upon the green gem reentering the kitchen, Greg slid a mug filled with a strong smelling brown liquid to her across the counter. "Thought you might want some; my head's still spinning from being knocked out." He took a drink from his own mug.

"What... what is it?"

Greg looked at her in disbelief. "Penny… where are you from? Sometimes you seem like everything here is alien to you."

She laughed nervously. "I can see why you'd think that."

-outside Beach City, later that day-

Peridot had spent the last hour searching for Lapis Lazuli, maybe her instructions for a meeting should have been more specific.

"Peridot!" The call came from above her, when she looked up she saw that the ocean gem was circling above her.

"Lapis, come down here! You're making me dizzy..." Peridot relinquished her human guise as Lapis began to descend.

"Peridot, I-I never got a chance to thank you properly." The blue gem pulled Peridot into a surprisingly strong hug. "Pass that on to Steven? I don-"

The green gem cut her off. "Do it yourself."

Lapis took a step back, confused. "What? I'm going to be leaving soon. I can't stay here."

"Oh? This, after Steven saved you twice, and I saved you once?" She raised an eyebrow at the blue gem, who turned her back and clutched her arms in response.

"This isn't my planet."

"Neither is Homeworld. I mean… Homeworld probably wouldn't even suit _me_ anymore." She put a hand on the other gem's shoulder, prompting Lapis to turn her head. "This place will grow on you, and so will its people. You don't have anything to fear, I promise."

"Peridot... Are you alright? You seem different."

"I am different, I suppose. In a good way." She took the other gems hand and turned to go. "Come on, we'll think up the way I found you on the way back to the temple."

Reluctantly, Lapis relented and allowed Peridot to pull her along. "I'll make up with the Crystal Gems, but I'm not joining them."

"I don't expect you to. I do, however, expect you to live among humans, like me." Lapis couldn't see it, but Peridot was smiling triumphantly. She was going to kill two birds with one stone. "We are going to be roommates. That way the gems think you're getting along with humans, and Greg will stop bothering me about getting a house."

"I never agreed to this!" Lapis pulled against the green gem's grip, though not hard enough to break it.

Peridot sighed. She had hoped Lapis would understand without being told. "Lapis… I think this is how gems are supposed to live. Not in a planet that is half machine, but on a thriving world with life teeming across it. Here there is room to grow. Homeworld was stifling. Just… feel the water of these oceans! Homeworld hasn't had oceans in thousands of years!"

Lapis rolled her eyes. "Peridot, what happened? You sound like a human… and a romantically minded human at that."

A nervous chuckle escaped Peridot's lips betraying her feelings before she even spoke. "Romance?! Whaaaaat…? No!" She averted her face so that Lapis couldn't see her blush.

"Okay, now I have to stay. If only to see just what this place did to you."

Peridot sighed in relief. "Thank you Lapis, I apologize for anything that I did to you in the service of Homeworld… I'm a changed gem. I hope we can be friends."

-Meanwhile, a bare room in The Gem Temple-

"Done." Garnet put the final panel on the specialized containment cell Pearl had designed. It was made out of salvaged tech from the Homeworld ship. They were hoping to use it in keeping Jasper prisoner without having to bubble her. They had questions that needed answering.

"Well, it looks like it fits my specifications, although it's rather lopsided…" The white gem looked over the large box disapprovingly. "I don't know, I think we should start over."

"Come on Pearl, we don't know when Jasper is gonna regenerate, let's just turn it on and see if it works." Amethyst tossed Jasper's gem into the cell.

"Well… I suppose it won't hurt…" Pearl switched on the energy source, also salvaged from the ship, and waited for the field to appear. "I don't think it works, let's tr-" Pearl was cut off by the metal box suddenly being filled by a slightly smaller glowing energy box with no bottom. "Well, of course it works, it is my design after all."

Amethyst laughed as she mockingly gave the cell a quick once over to make sure there weren't any cracks or gaps. "Looks good P, what now?"

"We wait." Garnet took up a cross-legged position on the floor.

"Gah!" Amethyst collapsed next to the larger gem. "I'm bored, getting a snack." Amethyst hurried off. Garnet got up shortly after, having just seen what was about to happen.

"Pearl, we need to go. The Solar Sea Spire is on the brink of collapse."

"But, what about Jasper? We don't know for sure that the cage will hold."

Garnet looked at the cage, divining it's fate. "It'll hold, now come on!" The two gems rushed off just before the glow of Jasper's regeneration filled the room.

"What, where am I?" Jasper couldn't see much from the inside of her prison, and what she could see wasn't worth looking at. _I can't believe it… The Crystal Gems were just too strong for me. Too strong for Malachite, wait, Malachite?"_ The memories of the fusion flooded into her head, overpowering her senses. _That was insane, I didn't realize how messed up that Lapis was towards the Crystal Gems… Peridot was right, we shouldn't underestimate Earth._

Suddenly, jasper heard the sound of a small voice came from the other side of the reinforced doorway. "Hello? Garnet? Amethyst? Pearl?" It was Steven. He opened the door and peered inside; he summoned his shield. "Jasper!" He stepped into the room, his expression stern.

It was amusing, such bravery in such a small gem. He would probably fight her on his own if he had to, _it is admirable_. "Don't worry shrimp, I know when I'm beat."

He let his shield disappear and took a seat opposite the orange gem. "Well, in that case…" He looked around the room, as though making sure they were alone. "Let's talk."

"Talk? Why?"

"Because, I want to understand you Homeworld gems. You can't just be fighting us because you want to."

Jasper's expression became serious. "I am."

"Why?" Steven seemed aghast at the notion.

"Because. Rose Quartz…" Jasper gritted her teeth at the memory of the night it had happened. "She killed the one gem I would have died for. She killed Rose Diamond."


	6. War Stories

-Homeworld, over five thousand years ago-

Jasper, captain of the guard for Rose Diamond, marched into her liege's private meeting room with haste; she had been called for an important council meeting.

Upon entering the room she found that the other members had already arrived and were looking at her expectantly, and with more than a little judgement in their eyes. "Jasper, please take a seat. I've been waiting for you." Rose's voice was as calming as ever. Any anger Jasper had felt at the judgement of her peers abated instantly. She walked to the Diamond's right side and took up her chair, barely noticing the pearl standing just behind her. "Now, I have gathered you all here today to discuss a new planet that was discovered last night by our scouts." The pearl stepped forward and projected an image of the planet in question in front of all those in attendance. "This is The House of Geb, or so the locals we have encountered call it."

"And what of it's resources? Would it support our new designs?" That was Emerald, one of the top gemsmiths in all of Homeworld's dominion.

"Yes, it seems to be the closest planet to our own that we have yet encountered. Perfect for any and all experiments you have planned." The pearl projected charts now, detailing the various chemicals and minerals of the planet.

"You said it has inhabitants, sentient inhabitants?" Beryl, Rose's military advisor, spoke up while stroking her long red curls. "How many soldiers would we need to deal with all of them?"

Rose laughed. "I hope none. This planet recovers miraculously quickly from disasters. We could create gems there and not even disrupt the ecosystem."

"You do realize that Yellow Diamond in particular will want production to be much faster than that. She has been speaking of a complete overhaul of her sectors, and she needs more gems for it." Emerald had her eyes closed, as though pondering the situation.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. For now, I just want to know what all of you feel about this planet?"

"It should be suitable testing ground for my injectors." The green gem opened her eyes and began quickly scrawling notes on a data slab.

Beryl went from toying with her hair to combing it. "As long as we stay away from too many natives I don't see a problem."

Pearl turned to Jasper. "And you?"

The orange gem was taken aback, she wasn't experienced in this sort of thing. Being called to the meeting had been strange enough, but now this… "I.. I'll follow you anywhere, Rose."

A sad look came over the Diamond's face before she responded. "I know you would Jasper. Speak with me after the meeting."

-After the meeting-

Emerald and Beryl had left after not much more discussion, and the Pearl had gone once Rose had ordered it to do so. Now it was just Jasper and her liege.

"The reason I asked you here, Jasper, is because I can't have you coming with me." Rose put her hand on Jasper's shoulder, continuing before the other gem could respond. "I need someone I can trust to take my place while I'm gone."

 _She can't be serious._ "Rose, you need me there to protect you, what if the natives are too hostile? We can't let you risk yourself." Jasper scoured her thoughts, trying to think up a new plan. "I know! You stay, and I'll go. That way-" Rose put a finger to her lips, silencing her.

"No Jasper. This is something _I_ have to do."

The guard lowered her head defeatedly, "I take it this is an order then?"

"Jasper, I-"

"Unless you order me to, there's no way I'm staying here." She steeled herself before meeting Rose's gaze. She was a soldier, and this was her charge.

"I won't order you to… but I will ask you," The larger gem grabbed Jasper's hand and held it tightly. "for me."

 _Come on Jasper, don't let her get to you! This is your duty!_ She let out a sigh. _I am her soldier… and I can't argue with her on this, I've gotten soft since I met her._ "Alright, but only if you promise me you'll be safe, AND you take fifty of my most capable guardsmen with you."

Rose laughed; a full, wonderful laugh. It brought a smile to Jasper's face despite the circumstances. "Oh, you're such a dutiful soldier. I'll be fine, and even better, I'll be back before you know it." Rose got up to leave. "I have to start planning immediately. Try not to fret too much while I'm gone."

"I assure you I'll fail."

-Five years later-

The unrest was incredible. Protests against the Diamond Authority were breaking out all over Homeworld, and some of the more distant colonies had cut off communication altogether. Jasper shouldered her way through the massive crowd that filled the streets, she had to find Beryl and Emerald. It was a catastrophe; nobody had heard from Rose in weeks.

The orange gem had to enter the palace through a servant's entrance since the main doors were packed by gems trying to get answers. She made her way through the back hallways to the ballroom. Strangely enough, the ballroom was filled with soldiers. It looked like Yellow Diamond had brought her guards with her. _Why is Yellow Diamond here?_

The Diamond turned her head to Jasper. "Ah, the Regent. I have… unfortunate news for you."

Jasper rushed towards her, protocol and honor forgotten for the moment, this was far more important. "Yes, what is it? Uh, your highness."

"It's about my sister." _Oh no._ "She has…" Yellow Diamond wiped a tear from her eye. "She has been killed by an impersonator." _Rose._ "We don't know how long the impersonator has been in place, but we hope to end it before the rebellion she is sparking spreads here."

Jasper felt something snuff out inside her, like a candle being suddenly blown out. _Rose is gone… and she isn't going to come back. I'll never see her again, not in all the thousands of years I live. I... failed her._ "By who?"

"Excuse me?"

"Who killed Rose Diamond?!" Jasper shouted. This seemed to make Yellow Diamond pleased despite the great breach in social grace.

"Her name, is Rose Quartz, or so she claims."

 _There's only one thing I can possibly do for Rose now._ "When can I leave?"

"We are dispatching troops within the day. I expect you'll want to lead the charge?"

"I'll _be_ the charge." _I've failed you Rose, but I will not let you go unavenged._

-Earth, a few months later-

Jasper stood in the midst of a massive battlefield. There were gems fighting and dying all around her, weapons flashing and striking each other in a sort of otherworldly song of death and fury. The song had a dance to accompany it, and it was one that Jasper knew well.

She lept into action, catching a tall green gem by the throat and slamming it into the ground, crushing it's gem under her heel. She then turned her attention to a pair of mahogany gems that had swords pointed towards her. She rushed forwards, energy blazing behind her. She used her crash helmet to send one flying off into the distance, and ripped the other clean in half before it could even get a strike in. She left it's gem laying there in the dirt. She had to move quickly; the imposter was supposed to be here fighting alongside her followers, her 'Crystal Gems'. But who knew how long until she fled like the coward she was.

Jasper had learned to respect the imposter whilst still hating her. The tactics she employed often left Homeworld strategists outmaneuvered and suffering for it. Jasper, however, had chosen her fiercest warriors for this battle, replacing fancy tactical maneuvers with ferocity. They had decided to raid the Crystal Gem camp at night. The goal was to destroy their leaders and cripple them. Survival was not a priority. _Perfect._

Jasper ran forward constantly, crushing small gems in her path and taking out the larger ones as efficiently as possible. Nothing would stop her, this was her chance. _She's waited long enough, it's time I give this Quartz what she deserves!_

Suddenly the camp was filled with spots of light. They had taken too long; some gems had been given the chance to fuse. _No time to stop, no time to slow down!_

She was swarmed by gems. They had been hiding, waiting for her in an ambush. _Fools!_ She crushed them all.

A light shone down from a nearby outcropping of rock. It was a deceptively pure light, seeming to banish all shadow from the battlefield. Yet to Jasper, all it did was show her a target. The light was emanating from a shield that was held aloft by a gem so close in appearance to Rose that under any other circumstances Jasper would have held back, even if just for a second. _Not now. Not here._ The orange gem charged forwards and took a leap, bringing her up onto the rise and less than twenty feet from her target. _YES!_

Jasper's hopes for victory were dashed by a swift kick from a small, white gem. The attack was unexpected, and it knocked Jasper onto her back. Unfortunately for the orange gem, the ground was so torn up and muddy that she began sliding back to the melee beneath the outcropping.

As she reached the bottom the white gem turned up her nose and spoke: "Nobody touches Rose."

"That" Jasper's voice was but a whisper as she tried to pull herself out of the churned up ground. "Isn't" She was barely able to stand. She had all but burned herself out getting here, but the rage inside her would carry her just a little farther. "ROSE!" Her cry was lost amidst the battle, the white gem didn't even take notice. _Is this what I'm reduced to now, just another scream on the battlefield? Pathetic Jasper, just pathetic._ Her legs fell out from underneath her, no more fight left.

A trio of gems stalked towards her, looking for easy prey in this bloodbath. Jasper's exhaustion caused their distinctiveness to fade away, but she could tell they meant her harm. _Can't let it end here… Not a chance._ She got to all fours. "So, you traitors want a shot? Take it."

They came at her together. Three blades whistling through the air. She knocked one aside with a sudden burst of speed, yet the other two managed to dart in and slash her; one across the arm, the other the face. The wounds woke her up. She could hear the music. _Time to dance_.

A massive, orange fist sent one of them tumbling away, and a well placed kick cracked the gem of the second, but the third saw an advantage and took it. A quick slice and Jasper couldn't feel her hand anymore.

The pain from her new stump nearly poofed the orange gem then and there, but she used the last of her strength to send her crash helmet straight through the last of the hateful gems.

That was it, Jasper had nothing left. She let her body disappear. _It seems all I can do for you is fail, Rose._

-Homeworld ship, high orbit-

It had taken Jasper nearly a month to reform, during which time the battles had continued, becoming more and more devastating. Though she had been combat-ready for over a week, the orange gem hadn't even thought about leaving the ship yet, let alone returning to the fight. She just didn't have the strength to fail Rose one more time.

"I see someone has been enjoying extended hospitality aboard one of my ships." The voice shocked Jasper to full alert. _What is Yellow Diamond doing here? Why would she be talking to me? I'm just a disgraced soldier now._

"I read the reports on your raid, you're of no use to anyone when you're that angry."

Jasper stared angrily at the gem. "Well what do you expect? I need to avenge Rose, and I can't."

Yellow Diamond just laughed at her. "I expect for you to be the soldier you are famed as." The regal gem tutted disapprovingly. "We're going to send you home if you stay this way."

The thought of returning to Homeworld with nothing but a slightly new form was almost as disgusting a proposition as failing Rose again. Almost. "Then what should I do? Forget what Quartz did to your sister?"

"No, but you need to take your anger and make it cold. It's too uncontrollable right now."

"This rage feels like ice to me."

"You don't need rage. You need hatred. Cold, calculating hatred. Hatred that lets you get revenge and live to tell about it." Yellow Diamond walked out, leaving a small pin of her insignia behind.

"Cold hatred…" _If I get much colder I'll be numb... Maybe that isn't a bad idea._ Jasper took the pin and put it onto the center of her shirt, where Roses' insignia usually was. _I'll meet Quartz one day, and when I do, I'm going to pound her into the dirt, but for now… let's focus on winning the war._

-Beach City, Earth, a nearly empty room in the gem temple-

Jasper had just finished telling Steven the tale. To be perfectly honest she didn't bare the kid any ill will, he wasn't like she had heard his mother was. Then again, she had never managed to actually meet Rose Quartz. _Oh, Rose, when did I start using your name for her._ The orange gem let her head hang as Steven looked on, more than a little confused.

"The gems never told me anything like this…"

"Yeah? Well I bet they never told you a lot of things, shrimp. That's what war is like, it's crazy and no fun for anybody." She turned her back on him. "Now, can I have some time to myself in this prison or are they gonna have to install a bunk for you?"

"Huh?"

"Get out… NOW!"

"Uh, yeah… Okay." Steven got up and left, but he watched Jasper the entire time he did so.

Once he was gone Jasper laid down onto her back. It had been so many years since she had thought about Rose this much. "Why'd you have to go and make me so soft just before you leave?" She wiped a tear from her eye. "Looks like there isn't going to be any revenge for you, but at least it seems like you would have liked this Steven kid. If anything he's more like you than his mother. Maybe that's a revenge of it's own."


	7. Must Be a Human Thing

-Beach City, Earth-

On the second floor of a small apartment complex in Beach City, two aliens were hauling furniture to their new shared apartment.

"I still don't see why we need beds, we don't even sleep!" Lapis Lazuli grunted as she lifted the deceptively heavy box up another stair.

" _I_ do," Peridot lied "and you didn't _have_ to spend your first paycheck on that thing." Her employer, Greg Universe, had offered to help out with her big move, so she was only carrying half the weight that her blue friend had to pull.

"Well, if you're gonna have one, I didn't want to feel left out." Lapis finally made it to their landing and breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay, now we just have to make… Let's see, the TV, the table, the couch, both of the nightstands, all of the shelves, and the two mattresses… seven more trips." She hung her head in defeat.

"Don't forget about the dresser!" Greg reminded her, causing her to slump against the wall.

"Why didn't we get beachfront property? I could have just used giant water hands to move all of it…"

"Because that would have been more expensive, and I don't want to spend our first week here drying off all the furniture." The disguised gem started pulling the box into the apartment while Greg went downstairs to grab something else to bring up.

Lapis followed the green gem inside dragging her own box behind her. "At least this place is big enough. I was worried we could only afford someplace dingy."

Peridot scoffed. "After they had to evacuate the city because of aliens rent has been at an almost record low!" She adjusted her glasses. "I also thoroughly researched every possible option to find the best value."

The two of them went back down to grab some more stuff. It took around an hour to bring everything upstairs and put it in the correct rooms.

Greg plopped down on their secondhand couch. "Gosh, I'm beat. You girls want to take a rest? I have a couple beers in the van if you want me to bring 'em up."

"Beers?" Lapis raised an eyebrow at the human.

"Oh, I guess you wouldn't have had anything like them on your homeworld, huh?" Greg scratched the back of his head, trying to think of how to explain the appeal of alcohol. "You know what, just forget it. Now probably isn't the best time."

"Oh… okay." _And here I had been genuinely interested._

"Done!" Peridot stood up triumphantly from where she had been hooking up all the wires for their television and DVD player.

"Oh, nice!" Lapis picked the remote up off the table; she had been waiting to try this 'Cable' that Steven, Lars, and Sadie had been talking about so much. She pushed a few buttons and eventually found a movie called 'Casablanca'. The three of them sat there, watching the movie, but Lapis found it hard to concentrate. Peridot and Greg were beginning to frustrate her; they were sitting slightly closer together than most people would, and every now and again one of them would glance at the other when they thought nobody was looking. _This is embarrassing… I should do something._

-Later than evening-

"Goodbye Greg, I'll see you tomorrow." Peridot called after the human before closing the door.

"You're hilarious." Lapis was leaning against the wall behind Peridot when she turned around, startling the green gem.

"I-I have no idea what you mean." Peridot tried to push past Lapis, but the ocean gem was having none of it and held firm.

"You like that human, don't you?" She raised an eyebrow as Peridot recoiled from her.

"What?! No!" She scoffed and stood up straight. "That's ridiculous!"

"You like him a lot."

"Lapis, please, you have the wrong idea! I mean, Greg and I, we just… I mean it's like…" She groaned and let her head fall against the wall. "Maybe a little."

"You should ask him out."

"Whaaaaaat?!" Peridot fell out of her disguise and back into her regular form as she turned to her roommate.

"I've seen what unspoken feelings can do to people. I've only been here for two weeks, but it seems I already know more than you do." The blue gem crossed her arms and let Peridot walk past her so she could collapse on the couch.

"He still loves Rose. I wouldn't have a chance."

"Maybe."

"You're horrible."

"I think I'm going to try that sleeping thing. I mean, I bought the bed, why not use it?" Peridot threw the remote at Lapis as the other gem walked away, but she missed wildly and it bounced off the wall.

-It's a Wash, the next morning-

Peridot walked into her place of work. She had been thinking about what to say to Greg all night, _this has to be perfect if I wanted to succeed._

"G-good morning Greg." Her boss was already working on their first car of the day.

"Hey Penny, why don't you go grab a squeegee and start on the back." The gem set to work as she was told. It was strange, working for a human, although she couldn't say she didn't like it. It was oddly freeing, doing a job she wasn't made for.

The two of them finished up the car in just around a minute, but another had arrived while they had been working. "I'll start up the machine." Peridot walked over to the levers on the wall and switched on the machines. "Hey, Greg, can I talk to you?" She called over the now noisey carwash.

"Oh, sure thing Penny, what's up?" Greg made his way over to the gem, careful not to get too close to the sprays of water and soap.

"I… I was just wondering if…" She looked at the ground, unsure of how to continue. She could feel heat rushing to her face, she would have to say something soon if she wanted to get the words out at all.

"Penny? Are yo-"

She cut him off. "Gregwouldyouliketocometodinnerwithmetonight?" The embarrassed gem spit the words out so quickly that Greg had to take a step back out of surprise.

"Penny… Did you just ask me out to dinner?" His eyes widened at the revelation.

"I… um… yes, er no, I mean... I did." _I was right. I never had a chance…_ She flicked her eyes up to look at the human. He was shocked to be sure, but… _is that a smile forming on his lips?!_

"Penny, I'd love to go to dinner with you." He smiled wide.

"That's okay, I understa... Did you say you would?" The shock was palpable.

"Yeah, I guess I did." He looked around nervously. "How about we meet at your place around seven? Where do you want to go?"

 _Oh no…_ She hadn't thought about this part, she didn't even like food, much less eating for fun.

After a moment of awkward silence, Greg took the initiative. "How about we go to that new italian place? It's been awhile since I went out for a nice dinner."

All Peridot could do was shake her head affirmatively. This was going much better than expected. _Ah yes, this is all playing out exactly as planned!_

-6:30, that evening-

"Well Stu-ball, wish your old man luck." Greg tousled the small boy's hair as he kept trying to get the collar on his shirt to stay down.

"Why do you need good luck at dinner?" Steven was confused.

"You'll understand when you're a little older, bud." He finally got the collar down. "There we go! Anyways, I've got to run, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Hmmm… Okay, well can you explain it later then?"

"Maybe." Greg pulled his son into a tight hug before leaving.

Still confused about what was going on, Steven made his way back to the Beach House deep in thought. _He's just eating dinner with Penny, and that isn't anything special. I eat dinner with my friends all the time. I had Connie over for dinner just a few days ago, and he didn't wish me luck._

"Hey Steven." Amethyst called down from the balcony."What's up?"

"Not much, Amethyst." Steven walked up the stairs to sit beside her. "My dad's acting kinda weird. He and Penny are going out for dinner, but he made it sound like it was some kind of big thing."

"Dinner?" The purple gem leaned in closer to the boy. "Dinner where?"

"Oh, some fancy italian place with lots of salads." He leaned against the railings and let out a sigh. "I just wish he'd tell me what the big deal is…"

"It sounds like a date to me." Amethyst leaned back and let out a sigh. "What's up with that guy..."

Steven was a little bit confused. _My dad, on a date? With… with Peridot?!_ "Amethyst," he gulped nervously, "are you sure that it's a date?"

"Pretty sure, dude." The two of them sat in silence for a minute, Steven too shocked to speak, and Amethyst looking more and more frustrated with each passing second, until she finally stood up in a huff. "Oh, the nerve of that guy!" She started pacing in a small circle behind the boy.

"Are you okay?"

"No, Steven!" The purple gem wiped at her eye even though no tears had formed yet. "I'm not okay."

He puzzled over what to say. _I don't know why Amethyst would be crying over my dad having a date, she doesn't even know who Penny really is._ "Amethyst… You have to to talk to me." He got up and pulled the other gem into a tight embrace. "I hate it when people cry without giving me a chance to help."

"I'm not crying, and I don't need help." Tears had begun to well up in her eyes now.

"Tell me what's wrong."

Amethyst closed her eyes and hugged Steven tighter. "I can't. I don't know." The two of them stood there for awhile, Steven no less confused than when the hug began. Eventually he couldn't hold his tongue anymore.

"Amethyst… Why would my dad be going on a date? I thought he loved my mom…"

"I don't know little man, must be a human thing."

-Lapis and Peridot's apartment-

Lapis was sitting on the sofa, just enjoying watching as Peridot kept trying to shift into different outfits. She must have been through hundreds in the last hour, making small changes to them every few seconds using her shapeshifting.

"I don't know what humans find attractive!" The green gem was stressing herself out so much that she had forgotten to form her arms into normal human ones, and still had her fingers floating about.

"Well," Lapis looked out the window and saw that Greg was finally walking up their street, "you had better figure it out soon."

The engineer fussed for just a moment longer before finally settling on the black dress she had worn to Steven's party months ago. She nearly screamed when she realized she had forgotten her hands, but quickly calmed herself and morphed them into the required shape. "How do I look?"

"Like a nerd." Lapis barely managed to duck when Peridot chucked a shoe at her. The anger on the other gems face caused her to break out into giggles.

"I wish you would take this more seriously. It's very important to me." The green gem tried to compose herself yet again, but nearly jumped when there was a knock on the door. "Okay Lapis, wish me luck!" She turned and opened the door. Greg was standing on the other side, he was dressed well (for Greg) in a turtleneck and khakis, though he was still wearing his sandals.

"Hey Pen-" He stopped short. "Wow. I forgot how nice you looked in that dress." The compliment caused Peridot to blush profusely. She tried to reciprocate it, but only managed to mumble something about turtles. "You ready to go?" Greg held out his arm for her to take. _Gah! I am so not ready for this!_

"Y-yeah, let's go. Wouldn't want to miss the meal." She took his arm.

"That's not how restaurants work Penny. If I didn't know actual aliens, I'd swear you were one." He laughed as the two of them made their way down the stairs.

"You kids have fun!" Lapis called after them before closing the door.

The two of them walked to the restaurant, making idle conversation along the way. Even as they did so dark clouds were gathering above them. They got there just in time to avoid the oncoming rains, and found it was mostly empty save for a few couples much like themselves.

"A table for two, please?" The server who was waiting by the door led them off to an unoccupied corner of the room that made it seem like they had the whole place to themselves.

"Of all the culinary establishments I've seen, this one is by far the nicest." Peridot looked around at the place. It was very well kept (not unexpected considering it wasn't old), but it was purposefully homey, with a curtain over the windows that resembled what a family on TV or in a book might have, and solid wooden furniture and cutlery that looked more antique than it was.

"Yeah, it's not too bad at all." The server brought them their menus before leaving to get them their water. "So, what do you think you'll get?" asked Greg, looking up at her from his menu.

She puzzled over the menu for a few minutes. Nothing looked remotely palatable, so instead of having to choose she did something that she had seen time and time again while researching human mating rituals. "Why don't," she closed her menu and batted her lashes at him, a practiced maneuver, "you order for me?"

Greg was taken aback for a moment, but he quickly recovered with a smile. "Alright, I can do that." He spent a moment flipping through his menu, but he was ready to order by the time the waiter returned. Greg ordered some sort of 'spagooty' thing with sauce and vegetables. As the pair of them continued on with their date, Peridot noticed something remarkable; while the two of them sat there in the restaurant, eating and chatting away, she didn't mind eating the food at all. Not with Greg across from her.

-Afterwards-

"Oh gosh Penny, it's raining buckets out there. Should I call us a cab?" The rain really was coming down, but Greg had paid for their dinner so Peridot didn't want to make him pay for this too.

"Well, I could call Lapis and see if she could help?" She frowned, remembering. "No, our phone isn't hooked up yet, I was going to do it tonight."

"I'll hail a cab, don't worry about it." He held his arm out from under the overhang in front of the restaurant, but it didn't seem like any cars were on the road. "Damn." He said after a few minutes, giving up.

"We could always run for it?" Peridot examined the rain as it fell. It wasn't far to her apartment, but they would both be drenched by the time they got there.

Greg followed her gaze, obviously sharing her worry. "Are you sure about this?"

"Sure…" She gulped nervously. "I-it sounds like fun… right…?"

Greg grabbed her hand. "Then let's do it."

They took off at a run, Peridot tripping over her heels for the first few steps before she managed to make them disappear without Greg noticing. The rain was drenching. Their hair, their clothes, everything was wet by the time they entered the lobby to Peridot's building.

"Oh man!" Greg leaned against a wall. "That was fun. I love it when excitement doesn't mean mortal danger."

Peridot snickered as she wiped her bangs back out of her face. "I agree."

"Well, I guess I'm going back out, I'll see you tomorrow?" Greg stood up from leaning against the wall.

"Oh… You're leaving already?" _Of course he is, he isn't going to hang around after on the first date! Stupid question, Peridot._ She took a step towards him. "I had a very good time out tonight, thank you Greg."

He took a step towards her in turn. "Hey, it was a great time. Will I… will I see you again? I mean like, on a date. I'm gonna see you at work tomorrow." He laughed awkwardly. "Sorry, I'm a bit rusty at this."

Peridot smiled widely. "I don't think so."

Greg's mouth hung open a bit as he gave her a blank look of shock and incomprehension.

"I mean about you being rusty! I don't think you're rusty… is what I meant." _Stupid, stupid!_

"Oh, uh…" He collected himself. "Thank you."

"About seeing each other again like this…" A blush rose up in her cheeks as she took a final step forward. She wet her lips and opened her mouth ever so slightly. _Do it!_ She leaned forwards and closed her eyes… only to find Greg's hands on her shoulders, holding her back.

"Penny, I… I'm sorry. I don't know if I'm ready." He let his hands fall to his sides and averted his gaze, looking down at the floor.

Peridot's blush deepened as she felt embarrassment build up inside of her. _How could I have been so reckless?! This isn't like me, what's wrong with me?_ "Y-yeah, I understand. I just, I just thought you know…" She laughed weakly, unsure of what to do now.

Greg scratched the back of his head as he brought his eyes back up to look at Peridot. "I mean, it's just the first date and I thought…" He sighed. "Oh who cares?" He closed the distance between them, pulling Peridot into a firm embrace.

"Greg!"

"I may be rusty, but let's hope this is one skill I haven't lost." He dipped her back and brought his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss. She closed her eyes to enjoy the sensation. Greg's beard scratched at her face, but she didn't mind. She hadn't imagined a kiss would be this enjoyable. _Maybe it was a good idea after all, thinking with my heart for once._

"Wow." Peridot said as she broke the kiss and put a hand on Greg's shoulder. "You've still got… Whatever that is."

The man blushed a little as he let her go.

"Get a roooom!" The two of them turned to find Lapis' face pressed against the lobby window from the outside. The distance that had been lost between them quickly grew again as they both took a couple steps away from each other.

 **A/N:  
Well that took forever to write! I mean't for this to be done awhile ago, but I guess things just got away from me. Lots of thanks to my boyfriend for editing AND writing the end paragraph. Anyways, as always I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts and opinions on this.**

 **Ps: Don't worry, there'll be more homeworld stuff next chapter.**


	8. Getting Closer

**A/N:**

 **Hey, so this chapter has actually been done for a bit down. I just didn't have it edited until now. Anyways, enjoy!**

-Homeworld, Blue Diamond's throne room-

"Your majesty." The amethyst dropped to one knee and bowed her head before Blue Diamond, Peridot 5 quickly did the same. _Why are we here? We were supposed to be meeting with Yellow Diamond, not her sister!_

"I appreciate your manners, not all gems know their place as well as you." The tall gem stood up from her throne gracefully and began walking towards them. She had a predatory grace, Peridot 5 could feel beads of sweat form on her brow. "It has come to my attention that you two have been digging around for the Rose Quartz file."

"Yes, we had hoped to learn about her before we attempted to fight against them." Peridot 5 gulped down the knot of anxiety forming in her throat.

"Smart." Blue Diamond made her way over to where Peridot 5 was kneeling and reached down to grab her by the chin, pulling her to her feet. "I respect smart gems." All Peridot 5 could do was gulp nervously before the diamond released her. "You are both about to be made aware of information that is so highly classified, if you speak a word of it to anyone except the gems in this room or my sisters, I will personally rip the gems from your bodies, shatter them, and have them used in fusion research. Am I understood?"

The two gems nodded, but only the amethyst spoke. "O-of course."

"Excellent." The diamond walked in a circle around the two gems while she spoke. "Rose Diamond was not assassinated by Rose Quartz. That was a story the Authority crafted so that we could have Rose Diamond and those that followed her… purged. Her love for the new kindergarten planet was interfering with gem production, and her all-around lack of respect for her sisters made her a liability we could not afford." She stopped walking so that she was standing in front of the amethyst and Peridot 5. "We hid this information to keep order, if it leaked into the empire we could be facing not just a small rebellion, but a full scale revolution." Blue Diamond walked back to her throne and sat down. "Prepare a skillful team, Captain, you'll need it when you face off against my sister… or whatever she's become."

-Kindergarten, Earth-

"Oh, where did these ancient clods hide their research files?" Peridot was sitting in the control chamber of Earth's kindergarten. She had been sifting through seemingly countless data files for the past several hours, and with this ancient tech who knew how long it would take for her to find what she needed.

A nearby cylinder rattled for a moment then lay still; the experiment inside in a dreamlike state of suspended animation. "Crazy ancient scientists, this work is incredibly dangerous. Why would anyone put so much effort into making amalgam gems? Why not just put the originals back together the same way?" That was what Peridot was after: if she could find something that valuable to the Crystal Gems, it would make an excellent incentive for them to forgive her any past transgressions, _and then I won't have to lie to Greg anymore._

"Why did they use such idiotic filing systems?!" Peridot mashed buttons on the keyboard in front of her, yet, miraculously enough, nothing happened except for the appearance of an error message on the screen. "Why, I oughta-" Peridot was cut off mid threat by one of the proximity alerts going off; someone was here. Peridot got up and went to inspect one of the screens showing a live feed of the nearby warp pad. "Oh. Great." It was the Crystal Gems, and it looked like they were searching for something. _Probably me..._ "Well," she switched off the console she had been using and it slid back into the wall. "time for me to leave."

Peridot hurried over to a nearby elevator and tapped her foot impatiently as it began it's long ascent. "I had such a nice, modern lab on my ship… but then the Crystal Gems just _had_ to blow it up." Peridot took a deep breath. _Calm down Peridot, if they hadn't broken all your stuff, you wouldn't have met Greg, and you wouldn't have fused for the first time._ Peridot smiled at the memory. As an engineer she had always shied away from combat, but when she and Steven had been Azurite… she had felt more courageous than she had ever thought she could be.

"Peridot?" It was Steven. The green gem's elevator had just reached the surface, and here he was. "I didn't think you'd actually be here." He rushed to her side.

"Oh, Steven… Hello." She had been hoping to get out of here before any of the gems noticed her… She looked over the nearby area, nobody else in sight. "Are the others close by?"

"Yeah, they're just over there." The boy pointed off to the left.

Peridot dragged her fingers down her face in annoyance. "Of course, why not." She eyed the gem shaped holes in the walls. _They're a little small, but maybe I could fit._ "Steven, you wait here. You didn't see anything, right?"

"You got it dude!" Steven stuck out his tongue and winked.

"Whaaaaa…" Peridot didn't have time to be confused, she could hear the gems approaching. She ducked into one of the holes and slid right to the back.

"Steven, did you find anything?" It was Garnet. Peridot could see she was standing just outside of her hiding place.

Steven was just short enough that Peridot could see him shake his head at Garnet. Good _Steven, good!_ The shaking turned to a slow nod, and then a more vigorous nod coupled with a shrug that said 'Yeah, I guess so.' _Bad Steven, bad!_

"You found Peridot? Where is she?" Garnet summoned her weapons. Peridot gulped nervously.

"She ran away." _That's technically true..._

"Steven, you should have called for us when you found her." Garnet bent down and put a hand on the boys shoulder.

"I know… I just wanted to talk to her. She doesn't seem all that bad." Steven scuffed his sandal across the ground.

"Well, show me where she came from, maybe she left some clues." _Oh no._

"Sure, she came up out of there." Steven pointed to the elevator Peridot had ridden up on.

 _If those clods tamper with the data down there, all that research will have been for nothing!_ Peridot's mind whirled with thoughts of the fusion experiments that the scientists had kept in the cylinders; it was likely that the two of them would wake them up if they got down there. Peridot climbed slowly and stealthily out of the hole once Steven and Garnet had started to walk towards the elevator. She had to lead them away from here. Looking around, Peridot saw an injector attached to the wall above her. If she shot it down, it could land right on top of the elevator, maybe even seal the passageway. But she had to get them away from where it would crash...

"HEY YOU CRYSTAL CLODS!" She shouted at the top of her lungs, despite the abject terror of now having to escape Garnet.

"Peridot!" Garnet rushed forward. _Oh stars is she ever fast.._. One of her fists fired like a rocket into Peridot's midsection, sending her flying into the air and away from Garnet's range as she activated her helicopter fingers.

The green gem attached herself to the wall and started running towards the injector. _Why did I have to care?_ She clutched the place where Garnet had struck her. _I'm lucky that hit didn't poof me then and there_. "Let's see how you like this?!" her right arm changed into cannon mode and aimed at the leg of the injector. Steven had followed Garnet to the base of the wall, so they were out of harms way.

"Not so fast, Peridot!" Pearl was running in from the opposite side, and she threw her spear with perfect accuracy. Peridot just barely managed to avoid it by clinging close to the wall. A metallic crack from behind her caused her to turn quickly. The spear might have missed her, but it had hit the injector, causing it to fall directly towards Steven and Garnet.

"Nonononononono!" Peridot blasted the falling Injector with her cannon, changing it's course ever so slightly. It fell just beside Steven and Garnet. The two of them were safe, but the crash had left a gaping hole in the ground leading right into the lab. _Well that didn't go as planned…_

Each and every canister in the lab burst. A large cluster of gem limbs that had been melded together crawled it's way up to the surface, followed by hundreds of lesser experiments. The more complete monster absorbed the smaller ones as it went, becoming larger and larger, with more and more limbs splaying out from the central body.

Garnet froze, and it looked as though Pearl and Amethyst were unsure of how to act with their leader out of commision. Steven was the only one who looked ready to fight, his shield on his arm.

"Come on guys, it's just another gem monster, right?"

Amethyst stepped up to beside Steven, her resolve fortified by his question. "Yeah, let's take this thing down!"

Pearl was not reacting as well as Amethyst, she had rushed to Garnet's side. "Garnet are you alright? What is that thing?"

Peridot lept from where she had been clinging to the wall, using her fingers float down beside Steven. "You clods just had to come searching for me? This thing was never supposed to get loose, it's a medical experiment!"

The Cluster was massive now, standing an easy thirty feet tall, with hundreds of arms and legs reaching towards them, getting closer every second.

"Penn- I mean Peridot, you're gonna help us?" Steven smiled.

"Well if I don't who's gonna stop this thing?" She readied her cannon and aimed it at the gems in the center of the monster.

Amethyst looked at Peridot, unsure of what to make of their enemy's sudden concern. "Really? You, helping us?"

Peridot was about to give a snarky response when one of the Cluster's massive arms hammered down onto them. Amethyst dodged deftly, but Peridot lacked the agility to follow. Luckily, Steven was right there; his shield protected the both of them from the colossal monster.

"Steven!" Pearl cried as she rushed forward. Noticing that Peridot was cowering under his shield with him, the white gem growled and knocked Peridot away with the butt of her spear. "You stay away from him!"

"Wha?! I was just trying to help!" Peridot pleaded, but Pearl wasn't having any of it. She pointed her spear at Peridot and began charging up a fireball, the cluster seemingly forgotten.

"Pearl, watch out!" Amethyst whipped at one of the Cluster's smaller arms as it grabbed for the pale gem, but couldn't stop it from grabbing hold of Pearl and lifting her into the air.

"Stupidcrystalgemsstupidmonsterstupidstupid!" Peridot raised her laser and fired it at the Cluster's arm, severing it and sending Pearl plummeting to the ground.

Pearl got to her feet and looked at Peridot in shock. "You, you saved me!"

"NO, REALLY?!" Peridot yelled in frustration. This fight was not going well.

Amethyst charged towards the monster, rolling into a ball to spin dash it. She was swatted aside by a deceptively fast arm and went flying into a nearby wall before another arm raised a fist and pounded her into the rock.

"ARGH!" A pained cry of rage from behind them caused all the gems to turn and look. Garnet had recovered from her stupor and was staring at the monstrosity before them. "These were Crystal Gems, we can't leave them like this! The purple gem took off running towards the Cluster, dodging it's hands as they reached for her, and wrapping her own hands around the gem in it's center.

"Yay, Garnet!" Steven called to the gem, raising his fist in the air.

Garnet gave the cluster of gems a pull and it flew loose; hundreds of crystal shards detached as it flew through the air before landing at Peridot's feet with a thud. _If I had the original specimen AND the research notes, I could speed up the research exponentially, there are containment vessels that could hold it on the old Homeworld ships! Of course!_ When Peridot looked up from the cluster of melded gems, all eyes were on her.

She picked it up, looked at the other gems, and sighed. _Maybe just giving it to them would be a better gift than figuring it out…_ "Fine." She threw the cluster of gems at Pearl as hard as she could, the gem caught it, stunned. Peridot activated her propeller and began floating up into the sky. "Can't you gems just for once, not break my stuff?!" _The research can wait until later._

Steven laughed as his friend floated away. "See Garnet, she didn't really want to fight after all."

"I guess not Steven." The purple gem adjusted her glasses as she looked after the receding speck of green in the sky. "But why?"

-The Big Donut, Beach City, Earth-

Lapis and Sadie sat behind the counter, listening to some music on Sadie's phone.

"It's a shame you don't have anything more, you know, cool." In her short time living in human society, Lapis had gained a strange liking for punk music.

Sadie rolled her eyes at the bluenette. "What, like the stuff Lars listens to? That stuff's okay, but these are the classics."

Lapis was about to respond when the bell above the door chimed, bringing their focus back to work as Steven walked in. He was their most regular customer, and Lapis' favorite human.

"Hey there Steven." Sadie called as she took her earphone out. "What can we get for you today?"

"Hm… hmmm… hmmmmm…" Steven kept hemming and hawing as he looked over the donuts.

"I suggest the cruller. They've got the weirdest texture." Lapis leaned over the counter as she spoke.

Steven laughed a little bit as he put a few bills on the counter. "Sure. I'll have two of those… er, four. It might be a long talk." He counted out the rest he would need in change and placed it beside the bills.

"Talk?" Lapis cocked her head to the side, intrigued.

"My dad wants to talk to me about Penny." Steven looked down at his feet. For some reason the thought of the talk made him feel weird

"I'm sure it'll be fine Steven. Here." Sadie handed him his donuts and he left with a wave.

"Why does he look so sad about talking with his dad?" Lapis asked her coworker, a puzzled look on her face.

"I remember around a year after my dad died my mom started dating other guys. It's not easy for kids when their parents move on, no matter how much they might like the new person."

Peridot and Greg dating was hurting Steven? Lapis didn't want to see Steven hurt; she would have to bring it up with Peridot later.

-It's a Wash, moments later-

"Hey there buddy, take a seat." Greg patted the spot beside him in the back of the van as his son approached. "You brought donuts? You're too good to your old man." He tousled his son's hair before taking a cruller out of the bag.

"Dad…"

"Yeah?"

Steven looked away from his father before he spoke. "Do you still love my mom?"

Greg was taken aback by the question. "Of course I do, I'll never stop loving her." He looked up at the clouds passing overhead.

"But then, why did you go on a date with Penny?" The two of them looked at each other in silence for a moment.

"Because it's been more than twelve years since your mom gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I've been mostly by myself since then. I didn't want to want to be with anyone else…" He closed his eyes and sighed, this was harder than he had been expecting.

"Dad…"

"I've gotten to thinking Steven. Your mom wouldn't want me to be by myself… She'd want me to be happy, and it seems like I might have found someone who makes me happy." Greg ran his hand over his head. He hoped Steven would understand, he really wasn't good at this sort of stuff.

"Do… do you love Penny?" Steven asked, unsure of a way to respond to what his dad had just said.

Greg chuckled at the question. "I don't know if I do or not. I like her, but you can't tell if you love someone so early in a relationship."

"Love takes time, and love takes work." Steven quoted.

"Y-yeah. When did you get so smart?" He pulled his son into a hug.

"It's something Garnet said."

"Well, she does know all about love."

"It seems like you know a lot too." Steven hugged him back.

"Well, I'm old hat at this game." He held his son in an embrace for a moment, then let him go. "You want to go play with the hoses? It's not gonna be warm for too much longer, it'll be one of our last chances."

Steven jumped out of the van. "Yeah! First one there gets to use the high pressure one!" He took off at a run.

"Hey no fair!" Greg laughed. "You got a head start!"

-Lapis and Peridot's apartment, that evening-

"Ugh, there's nothing interesting on TV." It had only been a week since they had hooked up their cable, but already Lapis was bored with it.

Peridot was sitting in the kitchen. She was experimenting with some ancient gem-tech she had pulled out of a ship she'd found whilst exploring the warp network that day. The engineer was trying to recreate her robonoids, and it was not going well. _How did these gems travel through space with such simple technology?! It's absurd!_

"Peridot! What can we do that's entertaining?" Lapis laid back over the arm of the couch, her fingers touching the ground. She could see that Peridot was getting irritated.

The green gem sighed. _This isn't going to work. This old tech was garbage to begin with, and the years have not been kind to it._ "Why don't you go to a rave with that Cream Cheese kid you were flirting with the other day?"

Lapis' face turned sour. "His name is Sour Cream, and I wasn't 'flirting'. That's something you do, not me."

"Oh, do not go there! I don't idly flirt. I actually have something to show for my romantic efforts." She turned her nose up at the other gem.

"Hey, I get lots of humans asking me out, they're just all creeps." Lapis pulled herself back up into a sitting position before walking over to where Peridot was sitting.

"Good, you're a perfect match." Peridot put down the useless prototype.

"How about we both go to one of Sour Cream's party? He's having one tonight, and I bet you'd have a lot of fun." Lapis looked at Peridot eagerly.

"Doubtful, and besides, I have a date in…" She checked the clock. "Half an hour."

"Ugh, fine. I guess I'll go by myself then." Lapis grabbed her jacket from it's hook by the door and put it on. She didn't need it, but she thought it made her look cool.

"Great, have fun." Peridot waved goodbye to her roommate. Once Lapis was gone, Peridot made her way over to the bathroom mirror to apply her makeup. It was becoming tiring to keep up this charade, It was getting to the point where she was considering just telling the gems, but then she remembered Garnet's punch and thought otherwise.

The doorbell rang, startling Peridot and almost making her smear her lipstick. She double checked her makeup and made sure she had shapeshifted her arms correctly before going to answer the door. "Oh, Greg, you're early. Are you ready to go to the movies?"

"Yep, I'm thinking we see whatever reboot of a movie from my youth is playing." He took Peridot's hand and the two of them started down the stairs together.

"Whatever you want to see is fine by me." She laughed before becoming more serious. "How did the talk with Steven go?"

The two of them reached the bottom and started up the sidewalk. "It went really well, he's so mature for his age… sometimes I get worried that all this gem stuff isn't good for him… I mean he's still just a kid, maybe it's making him grow up too fast"

Peridot thought back to the battle earlier, and how Steven had been the first one ready to fight the Cluster. "I think he'll be fine, he's strong."

-The Gem Temple-

Steven was sitting on the couch reading a new book Connie had given him a few days earlier. The book was good, but he was having trouble concentrating. The fight with the Cluster and the talk with his dad were both still keeping his mind busy, but none of the gems were around to talk to about it. Well, Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl weren't around… but there was another gem in the temple. _Maybe if I talk to her more, she'll stop being so angry._ He set his book down on the coffee table and made his way to the room where they were keeping Jasper.

The orange gem grunted as the door opened. It had been over three weeks since Steven had been in here last. The other gems had expressly forbidden him from talking with Jasper any more, but they weren't here now.

"What do you want, shrimp?" Jasper, to Steven's surprise, wasn't a mess. She looked exactly the same as the last time he'd seen her.

"I just want to talk. I'm lonely, and I thought you might be lonely too." He sat down across from her on the other side of the barrier.

"I don't really get lonely too easily. That's what happens when you spend years in space, all on your own."

"You spent years in space by yourself?" Steven asked confusedly.

Jasper sighed and leaned forwards, crossing her legs to sit more comfortably. "After I fought in the war, you remember I told you about that, I spent a few hundred years travelling the stars, hunting down rebels and anyone who helped Rose Quartz."

"Was this for revenge against my mom?" Steven had a concerned look on his face, it made him sad that gems would go so far just to hurt her

"Yeah. I couldn't hurt Rose directly, so I hurt those close to her instead." Jasper closed her eyes. "I did some things I'm not terribly proud of... but the point is, is that I spent years travelling with nobody but myself to keep me company."

Steven frowned. "It sounds sad."

"It wasn't."

The two of them were silent for a moment. "Jasper?"

The other gem growled before answering. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry my mom killed someone close to you… From what the gems told me, I never thought she'd do something like that…"

She snorted derisively. "I already told you, kid. The gems probably never told you a lot of things." She leaned back in her cell, done with this conversation. "Why don't you leave me alone and go ask them about the things they never told you?"

"Fine… I will."


End file.
